Although the braintrust of your Denver Broncos insists that it seeks out footballers of high moral character, the team has seen fifty player arrests since the year 2000, more than any other NFL franchise during that period. But cornerback and punt returner Adam "Pacman" Jones, just signed by the squad, makes other previous offenders seem like pikers when compared with this list of his thirteen arrests, suspensions and other missteps over the past fifteen years.
In January 2017, for example, Jones reportedly told an arresting officer in Cincinnati, where he's spent much of his professional sports career, to "suck my dick" and "Hope you die tomorrow."
These quips are captured on a video on view below.
The following roster of dubious deeds, illustrated by several pics from Jones's vast gallery of mug shots, is culled from sources such as ESPN, TMZ, the Cincinnati Enquirer and the West Virginia Metro News, which noted that Jones's first bust predated his entry into the National Football League.
Talk about a prodigy.
Number 1: October 2003
Jones was given a one-year jail jolt for beating a man in a bar with a pool cue while still a student at West Virginia University. Lucky for him, the sentence was suspended in favor of two years' worth of probation.
Number 2: July 2005
Two weeks before he was slated to start training camp with the Tennessee Titans, the outfit that drafted him, Jones was arrested and accused of assault and felony vandalism over a dust-up in a nightclub during which he allegedly punched the venue's owner and broke his necklace, valued at $400,000. The charges were ultimately dismissed.
Number 3: October 2005
Jones's probationary sentence out of West Virginia was extended by ninety days after he missed a check-in with his probation officer.
Number 4: March 2006
During the off-season, Jones visited Fayetteville, Georgia, where he was accused of marijuana possession.
Number 5: August 2006
Another Tennessee nightclub (this one in Murfreesboro), another police interaction. Jones was cuffed on suspicion of public intoxication and disorderly conduct after he claimed a woman tried to steal his wallet and then spit at him. His reward: six months' probation.
Number 6: October 2006
More problems at a nightclub? Why, yes. At a Nashville watering hole, Jones was the alleged spitter, with his target being a female college student. He received a citation for misdemeanor assault.
Number 7: February 2007
What the West Virginia Metro News refers to as "the infamous $81,000 make-it-rain incident" involved a Las Vegas strip club, a shooting that paralyzed a security guard and an exotic dancer whose head Jones reportedly beat against the stage. Jones was suspended from the NFL for an entire season, and a civil judgment against him resulted in an order to pay injured individuals from the club more than $11 million cumulatively.
Number 8: January 2008
This time, the strip club was in Atlanta, where Jones allegedly punched a woman in the face.
Number 9: October 2008
The Dallas Cowboys, who had picked Jones off the scrap heap, assigned bodyguards to watch him, presumably in an effort to keep him out of trouble. It didn't work: Jones got into a fight with his protectors, earning himself another year-long NFL suspension.
Number 10: July 2011
At a bar in Cincinnati, Jones picked up a few drinks, followed by beefs for disorderly conduct and resisting arrest.
Number 11: June 2013
Taking to Twitter, Jones claimed that that he had been arrested at, shockingly enough, a Cincinnati bar for "protecting myself" from two women.
Number 12: January 2017
Back in Cincinnati, Jones was arrested for assault, disorderly conduct, obstructing official business and the disgusting-sounding offense of harassment with a bodily substance. Along the way, he delivered the dialogue noted above, as seen in this TMZ clip:
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In May of 2017, Jones pleaded guilty to obstructing police and was sentenced to the two days he'd already served in a local jail.
Number 13: July 2018
A karmic moment if ever there was one: Jones was reportedly the victim of an attack by an employee at Atlanta's Hartsfield-Jackson International Airport. The other guy was arrested, not him.
Will wonders never cease.