Audio By Carbonatix
For all intents and purposes, Shelby, Occupy Denver’s new canine leader, appears to be a polite and demure, if strangely food-focused, politician. The three-and-a-half-year-old will lead the group’s march against corporate personhood this weekend, and all of her actions to date have been as sure-footed as someone with four paws should be. Why, then, does she appear to be tweeting about sex and weed?
The answer is simple: Some rogue agent with way too much time on his or her hands has created a fake Twitter account for Shelby, @OWSDenverShelby. This person appears to oppose almost every single aspect of the Occupy Wall Street movement and has opted to serve those feelings with a side of serious passive aggression. The account, which finds Shelby encouraging mothers to use their children as human shields, has earned attention from the movement’s official Twitter account, which denounced its existence last night:
@OccupyDenver
OccupyDenver The vile twitter handle @OWSDenverShelby is UNAFFILIATED with #OccupyDenver, Shelby, or Shelby’s owner. Please block and report spam. #ows
Nov 10 via webFavoriteRetweetReply
“I want to thank #OccupyDenver for electing me their new leader! I will do you proud. #ows #woof,” fake Shelby told 59 followers in her first Tweet. In the span of exactly one day, fake Shelby has managed to Tweet 123 times. It’s tough being a faux-fur version of the world’s first occupation leader, and fake Shelby takes out her frustrations, in large part, on anarchists. Although the account is currently following more than twice the amount of people who follow it (128 at this writing), Occupy Denver remains strict about its encouragement to block and report the human acting as a dog who is acting as a human.
In the meantime, read some of fake Shelby’s most scandalous fake opinions below:
@OWSDenverShelby
OWSDenverShelby We #OWS want to applaud all the Moms bringing their children to #occupyPortalnd to use them as human shields! http://t.co/s3UnUCem
Nov 11 via webFavoriteRetweetReply
@OWSDenverShelby
OWSDenverShelby We #OWS pledge to remain non-violent…and we will BREAK SHIT and FUCK THINGS UP until all Americans join us! http://t.co/k5Ip2cSc
Nov 11 via webFavoriteRetweetReply
OccupyChicagoOccupy ChicagoNight crew holding it down! Coffee would be amazing 😉Nov 10FavoriteRetweetReply
@OWSDenverShelby
OWSDenverShelby .@OccupyChicago we at #OccupyChicago and #OccupyDenver demand FREE coffee…and not that cheap shit…we want the gourmet stuff! #ows
Nov 10 via webFavoriteRetweetReply
FearDeptUS Dept. of FearWith the help of our media we overcome education.Nov 11FavoriteRetweetReply
@OWSDenverShelby
OWSDenverShelby .@FearDept Comrade, we ain’t be needin dat edumacation no mores now dat we at #ows is showin them peoples how things is done!
Nov 11 via webFavoriteRetweetReply
OccupyPicsStevie TPhoto: And don’t forget to free Mumia: goofcitygoof posted a photo: Bank Transfer March, Guy Fawkes… http://t.co/O1Ki4jYz#occupySF#owsNov 11FavoriteRetweetReply
@OWSDenverShelby
OWSDenverShelby .@OccupyPics free “Mumia”?? is that some of that newfangled Weed they’re giving away at #occupyOakland? How can I get me some? #ows
Nov 11 via webFavoriteRetweetReply
More from our Occupy Denver archive: “Occupy Denver elects a new leader: Shelby, a Border Collie mix.”
