In this week's cover story, "Feed Me," I tell my totally true, slightly embarrassing story of getting a late-night parking ticket in LoDo. What started as a joyful night of karaoke glory ended with an angry little yellow envelope, thanks to new city parking rules. And I know I'm not alone. Now, I'd like to hear your stories of attempted overnight parking gone awry.
Here's an excerpt of my story:
When the karaoke began that warm June evening, I'd already been guzzling cold cans of Avery Brewing's White Rascal, which was completely unnecessary, because despite my inability to carry a tune, I will do karaoke stone-cold sober. Luckily for my audience that night, "Ice Ice Baby" requires no actual singing, but it does force you to rap the lines "Quick to the point, to the point, no fakin'/Cookin' MCs like a pound of bacon."
The crowd was eating it up and I was on a roll, bobbing my head like a badass between verses. When I finished, there was a rainstorm of high-fives from the people I'd come with, all of whom are apparently fans of grown-ass women singing novelty rap songs. Or maybe they were just being polite -- it was hard to tell.
A couple hours and at least one more song later, I paid my tab and called my fiancé (whom, incidentally, I had wooed two years earlier, on our first date, with a karaoke rendition of '90s R&B trio Bel Biv Devoe's "Poison"). Owing to my mass consumption of White Rascals and his good-hearted nature, he offered to meet me at the bar and drive my car home.
When I finally pushed through the throngs of adoring fans and out onto the Larimer Street sidewalk, I was greeted by a horrific sight. Wedged in the crack between the doors of my car, which I'd parked three hours earlier at a metered spot in front of the bar, was a bright-yellow envelope. I'd gotten an effing parking ticket.
Has this happened to you? Leave your story in the comments section below. Next week, we'll choose the best ones and publish them in a separate blog post. Misery loves company.
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More from our News archives: "Overnight parking: 28,700 tickets issued between 10 p.m. and 8 a.m. this summer."