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Photos: Ten weirdest recent Denver Craigslist "Rants & Raves"

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Love it when people can't keep their thoughts to themselves for one second longer and just have to spew? Then you'll love the Rants & Raves category on Denver Craigslist, which regularly features declarations that vacillate from sensible to downright loony. We picked and photo-illustrated ten of the weirdest from recent days, shared unedited -- just as they were posted. Experience free speech at its freest below. Number 10: Microwave mind control. (the future)

By this method, any mood or behavioral set, can be conditioned into the target's brain. Intelligence agents keep a log of the victim's behavior to see if more intense 'treatment' is needed and as a guide for future mind control projects. It is alleged that by this method, UFO and conspiracy researchers, are routinely driven to commit suicide. having the excitation potential for suicide beamed into your brain day and night by microwave mind control weapons, soon resets the brain into a cycle of depression that spirals out of control ending in suicide.

I am a Targeted Individual and I am not going to sit back for gang stalking. If you are reading this and mean me harm I will report you to authorities of higher enlightenment, meaning Gods (Geothermal Oxidative Darmstadtium 110.)

Number 9: why are people who ride Rtd so weird?

Why are people such goofy weirdos who ride the buses? You call and make false allegations! Are you that retarted to lie? There are cameras and audio on the buses! You moran do you know how to read? You fool imbicile!!!!!!!!. I hope I see your fat ass on the street you wanna be a man you were born a girl you thing!!! Not a man quit trying to actlike one

Continue to see more of the ten weirdest recent Denver Craigslist "Rants & Raves." Number 8: to who ever hit my blue pt cruser near troy and illif in aurora

you just cost me over $1500 worth of body work, plus the replacement wiring kits which i dont have a cost for yet, on my car that i dont have!!!! you hit my car, nearly took off the front bumper and fried some of the wiring system for the lights and fuel systems!!!! if you do see this email me and fess up. this is your mistake, you (or your insurance) need to pay for the damages! you cant hit some ones car and leave not even leaveing a note or trying to figure out who the car belongs to. wtf would you have done if i did that to you???? would that make you angry? would you want to pay for this out of pocket? surely not!!

Number 7: Be Proud To Be An Alcoholic

Winston Churchill, George Bush, John Ford, Ulysses S. Grant, Ernest Hemingway, Stephen King Edgar Allen Poe, Anthony Hopkins, Robert Downey Jr., Keith Urban, Glenn Beck..............................on and on and on.


My uncle was to, he was seen as the black sheep at the time, a has been, but then went on to become a successful businessman, owner of 7 small businesses, and millionaire.

I was an alcoholic to, went on to get my degree, finishing graduate school, and part owner of a business.

Embrace it, accept it, and see what others do not see.

No regrets here. Live your own life and all its ups and downs.

Continue to see more of the ten weirdest recent Denver Craigslist "Rants & Raves." Number 6: 2016 already started...

OH NO...

Number 5: What's this world coming to? (front line)

The "ascended masters" who some call ancient aliens. Use human channels such as Shirley MacLaine, lord Maitreya and a host of others (pun intended) to manipulate mankind.

Are they not the disembodied spirits of the Nephilim?

The cursed offspring of fallen angels and the daughters of men. Rosemary's baby if you will.

Demonic and unclean spirits who's physical bodies were wiped out via flood who now seek a human host? They're insane enough to still believe that they're plan will come to pass. But they are doomed to fail again as they always have. Take Nazi Germany for example.

Not unlike Lucifer's original epic fail way back in the day.

These extraterrestrial rulers of the darkness of this world will never stop trying until they are thrown into the lake of fire.

Get ready planet earth, you aint seen nothin yet.

Continue to see more of the ten weirdest recent Denver Craigslist "Rants & Raves." Number 4: Does caring cradle? (or become a boa constrictor?)

You Only Have No One When You Never Let Go

The curtain opens on two, together as any communion that can't imagine any severance that could undo....and then the grip is tested, even though surety of it was more than apparent before the strength within was questioned. And from that slip it becomes all about domination by indifference subconsciously, despite the absence of conscious desire to fall from grace into this dance turned wrestling match. Who squeezes the tightest gains no victory from inflicting bruises or constricting breath...but each take their turns that appall the audience, before devolving into a wordless contest for who can care less the quickest. Like any of us who just want the thoughtless pretense of total control or complete compliance over with, the muscles falter with the will to make it nothing but wounding and cold before the curtain falls again...and as the house lights rise, we're left wondering if we have the breath to waste on denials or question the relevance. It was supposed to be more about mutual regard and deference, according to all the beginning promised...why did the hands that touched more than enough to move turn to clutching what cannot dance when constrained?

Is love control?...Samuel Bear Davis...

Number 3: Cheetos and Goldfish

Guv, Coloradoans broke out the Cheeto's and Goldfish a long time ago, Amendment 64 simply confirms the wishes of the people. Some of us Coloradoans much prefer Cheetos over pork rinds and pickled eggs , washed down with beer from one of our local breweries until our check liver light comes on.

Continue to see more of the ten weirdest recent Denver Craigslist "Rants & Raves." Number 2: i know you fucktards

hey ! i am gay ! works for me!!! never really considered that! thanks!!!.............

Number 1: Get ready planet earth, you aint seen nothin yet (Is Nothing Something Worth Seeing?)

I know that it's something worth doing... I AM a puffin you know!

More from our Lists & Weirdness archive: "Photos: Twenty funniest Colorado posts on FunnyJunk.com."

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