Rockbar welcomes spring with new beer garden: Kenny Be's Yard Arteology

Yard Arteology: The study of neighbors through lawn decoration... The photograph of the impaled beer bottles above proves that yard art is as popular with hotel guests as it is with homeowners. And it can also be said that the choice of ornament and method of display chosen by both transients and the permanent residents corresponds directly to the length of time they plan to stay in town... As seen in the picture above, the back yard of the All Inn/Rockbar compound on East Colfax Avenue is primarily used as a parking lot. That there is little room for yard art has not prevented the residents from expressing their creativity. The limitations have actually turned out to be an inspiration, as evidenced by the celebratory display of skewered empties as spring flowers.

The brand names on the beer bottles suggest that the guests of this establishment drink for flavor and not for cost. Displayed brands include Fat Tire, Rolling Rock and Stella Artois. The alternation of color and label across the fenced beer garden insinuates that the yard artist probably graduated from college with a degree in media arts.

The mid-seventies Lincoln Towne Coupe and Ford Torino that are backed into the parking spaces behind the fence further implies that hipsters, who have yet to purchase their own homes, are working out their latent need to decorate a beloved dwelling.

More from our Kenny Be/Comics archive: "Mark Udall's Congressional team-building game plan: Kenny Be's Worst-Case Scenario."

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