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The Ultimate Croc

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It's hard to miss the ever-proliferating product line of Niwot-based Crocs, those happy-go-ugly purveyors of crayon-colored plastic boat shoes. Factories around the world are now cranking out enough of the patented closed-resin, hole-riddled footwear to fill endless miles of future landfills. Wal-Marts are teeming with endless knockoffs and logo-riddled variations, including yes, purple versions for Rockies fans. And so many seniors have adopted the kiddy clogs that the brand earned a derisive nod from today's installment of the geriatric comic strip "Pickles."

But among so many goofy choices of Disney Crocs, pirate Crocs, Crocs with canvas or leather uppers, Crocs ballet slippers, you name it, it's hard to find a more unsightly contribution to the clown-shoe line than the just-unveiled MAMMOTH, a Croc with a fleecy, faux-fur lining. The shoes have holes in them like the original design, but they'll still keep your feet toasty—the holes are fake, too. Imagine: plastic shoes with fake fur and fake holes! What could be more hip this winter? – Alan Prendergast

Keep Westword Free... Since we started Westword, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of Denver, and we would like to keep it that way. Offering our readers free access to incisive coverage of local news, food and culture. Producing stories on everything from political scandals to the hottest new bands, with gutsy reporting, stylish writing, and staffers who've won everything from the Society of Professional Journalists' Sigma Delta Chi feature-writing award to the Casey Medal for Meritorious Journalism. But with local journalism's existence under siege and advertising revenue setbacks having a larger impact, it is important now more than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" membership program, allowing us to keep covering Denver with no paywalls.

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Join the Westword community and help support independent local journalism in Denver.

 

Join the Westword community and help support independent local journalism in Denver.