Gator fans (God love 'em) vs. John Oliver (British comedian). Merril Hoge (sportscaster) vs. LeBron (similarly hated NBA player).
Hulk Hogan (uh, wrestler?) vs. the billboard guys.
Loving Tebow means being blind to his problems (and his personal beliefs). Hating Tebow means hating on the Broncos, which you'd never do. Unless, of course, you are part of the Suck for Luck group of people who want the Broncos to perform so poorly this season that they finish with the worst record and therefore the first pick in the NFL draft -- a pick that will land stud Standford quarterback Andrew Luck.
But rooting against the Broncos is also a problem. After all, Raiders fans root against the Broncos, as well. So does that put you on the same side as Oakland?
It's a confusing situation for all Broncos fans. Good luck figuring it out.
More from our Shmuck archive: "Raymond Davis's bagel fever gets ex-CIA contractor in trouble again: We spy a Shmuck."