That's the apparent philosophy of Justin Jay, who's accused by Denver Police of going from a bicycle crash to a bare-assed walk-off in record time.
The story comes to us courtesy of 9News, which received cell-phone video from a viewer of what anchor Gary Shapiro accurately describes as a "really weird scene."
At 5:47 p.m. on Wednesday, according to the station, Denver Police received a report about a crash involving a bicycle and a scooter on Irving Street near the 35th Avenue intersection.
Jay, who's thirty, was the man on the bike, and he didn't seem to enjoy either the collision or the attention of bystanders. The amateur videographer says Jay tried to assault the woman who'd been piloting the scooter, as well as folks watching the spectacle. Then he started throwing whatever he could find at cars as a prelude to removing his clothing.
That's where the video picks up. Jay can be seen resolutely walking away from the area, clad in nothing other than an oval 9News placed over part of the image to make his appearance moderately less cheeky.
Cops caught up with a still-nude Jay on 35th Avenue. He's reportedly been ticketed for reckless driving -- maybe because there's no "reckless stripping" offense on the statute.
Here's the video:
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