Summer squash originated in Mexico in 5500 BC and was brought to Europe by Columbus himself. The zucchini as we know it today was developed by the Italians into a magic plant that could provide for all the necessities of family living. In Denver's Westwood neighborhood, the zucchini provides everything from food to faith to temporary housing... As illustrated on the Denver Neighborhood Seed Company Package shown above, the Westwood zucchini is famous for its versatility and size. Prolific Westwood zucchini plants will quickly produce flowers and fruits when continually picked, or will grow one mobile-home-sized zuke if left alone. By summer's end, a family of four can carve out a gigantic fruit's interior and create a comfortable two-bedroom home to protect against the onset of winter.
Westwood zucchini is the perfect food for people on low-fat diets, as there are only 100 calories in every one hundred pounds if it is served steamed. However, the healthful properties are quickly lost if the zukes are breaded, deep-fried, covered in cheese or baked in bread or muffins chock full of walnuts and chocolate chips.
Faithful neighborhood pagans grow Westwood zucchini for the plant's magical attributes. It is believed that the super-prolific flowers and fruits resonate with earth energy and are feminine in nature. Zukes are used in rituals for increases, favors and fertility.
If you like this story, consider signing up for our email newsletters.
SHOW ME HOW
You have successfully signed up for your selected newsletter(s) - please keep an eye on your mailbox, we're movin' in!
More from our Kenny Be/Comics archive: "Fracking Aurora is a natural gas: Kenny Be's Worst-Case Scenario."