What should Joe Nacchio do with his last six days of freedom?

A judge has ruled that disgraced Qwest CEO Joe Nacchio must report to a Pennsylvania prison by noon on Tuesday, April 14, to begin serving his six-year insider-trading sentence, which he's asked the Supreme Court to review. What should he do between now and then? Some suggestions: Today: Run up...
By Michael RobertsApril 8, 2009
Carbonatix Pre-Player Loader

Audio By Carbonatix

A judge has ruled that disgraced Qwest CEO Joe Nacchio must report to a Pennsylvania prison by noon on Tuesday, April 14, to begin serving his six-year insider-trading sentence, which he’s asked the Supreme Court to review. What should he do between now and then? Some suggestions:

Today: Run up a really massive cell-phone bill.
Thursday: Propose to Ruth Bader Ginsberg.
Friday: Spend the night drunk-dialing former Qwest investors.
Saturday: Spend the night drunk-dialing former colleagues who’ll no longer return his calls.
Sunday: Finally watch the final season of Oz.
Monday: Start a Ponzi scheme. With Bernard Madoff out of circulation, the market’s wide open.

GET MORE COVERAGE LIKE THIS

Sign up for the This Week’s Top Stories newsletter to get the latest stories delivered to your inbox

Notice of Collection | Terms | Privacy

Keep Westword Free

No paywall. Always accessible. We’re always watching out for you and our community — but we need your help to keep us going strong. Help keep Westword free and in print every week.

Select how much you'd like to contribute

/month
Support Us Today

Michael Roberts began his career with Westword in 1990 as music editor. In 1999, he took on a new role, full-time media reporter, as author of a column called The Message. In 2008, he became the lead writer for Westword‘s news blog, The Latest Word, a position he held until January 2023. Michael continues to freelance for Westword, covering everything from business to sports and the media; he also contributes to Jazziz, a national music magazine. He holds a bachelor’s degree from what is now Colorado Mesa University and master’s degrees from the University of California, Los Angeles, and Northwestern University.

michaelrobertscolo@gmail.com

Loading latest posts...