Calhoun: Wake-up Call

Wed Alert

Love and marriage, love and marriage, do they really go together like a horse and carriage? Colorado congresswoman Marilyn Musgrave was a featured attraction at this past weekend's Values Voter summit in Washington, D.C., part of a panel discussing "The Preservation of Traditional Marriage." And when the sponsor of the...
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Love and marriage, love and marriage, do they really go together like a horse and carriage?

Colorado congresswoman Marilyn Musgrave was a featured attraction at this past weekend’s Values Voter summit in Washington, D.C., part of a panel discussing “The Preservation of Traditional Marriage.” And when the sponsor of the marriage amendment in the U.S. House of Representatives was introduced to the tune “Love and Marriage,” she got a standing ovation.

But what, exactly, was the family-values crowd applauding? If you really listen to the lyrics of the song made famous by Frank Sinatra — and written by Sammy Cahn and Jimmy Van Heusen for a TV production of Our Town in 1955 — you’ll realize that there’s nothing hetero-exclusive about them. In fact, if love and marriage go together like a horse and carriage, then it follows — naturally — that homosexuals in love should be able to marry.

So should Musgrave find herself singing the same old song, here are some customized lyrics she might find more appropriate to her position:

Same-sex marriage, same-sex marriage

That’s the concept that I so disparage

This I tell you, brother

Your mate should have parts like your mother.

Same-sex marriage, same-sex marriage

Next you’ll wed the horse that pulls the carriage

Ask the GOP pick for lite guv —

She’ll tell you gay life leads to beasty love.

Try, try, try to separate them

It’s an illusion

Try, try, try, and you will only come

To this conclusion.

Same-sex marriage, same-sex marriage

That’s the concept that I’m here to disparage

Dad wasn’t told by mother

You should have hooked up with my brother.

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