Best of Westword Winners: 1989

In 1989, Westword published its sixth Best of Denver issue, a celebration of the city that saluted everything from perennial favorites Pirate, El Chapultepec and John Elway to the Best New Screen (the just-renovated Esquire), the Best Place to Get on Track (Caboose Hobbies, where pint-sized star Gary Coleman had just climbed on board) and the Best Renovation: the Denver Permit Center. That building now stands empty, but the big office next door in City Hall is occupied by a man who made his first appearance in the 1989 Best of Denver: John Hickenlooper.

In the fall of 1988, a geeky, unemployed geologist and a handful of partners with just a smidge more experience opened the town’s first brewpub, the Wynkoop Brewing Company, set in a ramshackle part of the city that had just been dubbed the Lower Downtown Denver Historic District. And the rest is, indeed, history. The brewpub industry exploded in Denver; Colorado now produces more beer than any other state; today LoDo is the hottest spot in the city; and the accolades keep coming for the Wynkoop. As for Hickenlooper, he left the restaurant business to make a dark-horse run for mayor. Five years later, he continues to enjoy unprecedented popularity with Denver voters. Cheers. Here are the rest of the winners from 1989:

BEST OF DENVER 1989

SURVIVAL

Best News About Denver:
It did not dissolve into a pool of goo. Not really.

Best Timing for a Party Invitation:
Rocky Flats

Best Place to have a Nervous Breakdown:
Mother Cabrini Shrine

Best Name for the New Airport:
Dynasty International

Best Place to Kill Time at the Current Airport:
Tee-Off & Take-Off

Best Place to Kill Time–and Brain Cells–at the Airport:
The Oyster Bar, E Concourse

Best Place for Mother Teresa to Open Up Shop:
The old Denver Post building

Best Stapleton Concourse:
E Concourse

Best (and Perhaps Only Good) Thing about the Airport Campaign:
Roger Ailes’ defeat

Best Local Crime:
The Grand Prix
Reader’s Poll: Silverado scam

Best Place to Panhandle:
Outside the Mayan
Reader’s poll: 16th St./Larimer Square

Best Panhandler:
Ron, the Boulder Mall

Best Unofficial Public Bathroom:
11th and Ogden

Best Official Public Bathroom:
The Tabor Center

Best Place to Dump your Garbage:
Galapago and Bayaud

Best Graffiti:
Anarchy Alley

Best Sign:
Dairy Queen

Best Suburb:
Wheat Ridge
Reader’s Poll: Arvada

Best Lawn Ornaments from Hell Yard Display:
28th and Kearney

Best Sign with a Martini:
Vern’s Restaurant and Lounge

Best Place to Get a Driver’s License:
Capitol Hill People’s Fair

Best Speed Trap:
Auraria Parkway
Reader’s Poll: I-25 at I-225, 6th Ave. near Union

Best Cheap Parking Downtown:
Allright Colorado, 23rd and Curtis

Best Commute:
Boulder-Denver Express

Best Highway Improvement:
I-25/6th Ave. Interchange

Best Alternative to I-25:
Foothills Parkway (north) Santa Fe south)

Best Alternative to I-70:
W. 44th Ave.

Best Renovation:
The Denver Permit Center, 200 W. 14th Ave.

Best Candidate for Renovation:
A.B. Hirschfeld Press Building

Best Use of Architectural Frills:
The Far East Center

Best Use of an Old Quote in an Economic Development Ad:
Pueblo Economic Development Corporation

Best Tourism Campaign:
“Colorado’s Outback-The Other Colorado”

Second-Best Tourism Campaign:
“Throw Momma on a Train”

Best Roadside Attraction:
Tarado Arriba

Best Place to Take Tourists:
Red Rocks

Best Place to Scare the Bull out of Texans:
Rollins Pass

Best Place for Tourists to Scare Denverites:
Casa Bonita

Best Geological Formation:
Across US 285 from the Fort

Best Place to See Bigfoot (and Best Way to Increase Colorado Springs’ Tourism Trade): Pike’s Peak

Best Place to See a Bald Eagle (winters only):
Barbour Pond, I-25

Best Place to Play Hide and Seek:
Central Bank Fountain

Best Place to Meet Men:
Listen Up

Best Place to Meet Women:
Home Club Retail Warehouse Store # 52

Best Place for a Nooner:
The Colorado Railroad Museum

Best Place for a Quickie:
Senate Chambers Observatory, State Capitol

Best Political Decision:
To Kill Two Forks

Best Bumpersticker:
“Denver: Piss on Your Lawns”

Second Best Bumpersticker:
“Communist is Ugly”

Best Lawyer’s Code:
Denver Bar Association

Best Use of Taxpayers’ Dollars:
Women in Crisis

Best Abuse of Taxpayers’ Dollars:
IRS Fitness Center

Best Name for a Conference:
“RTD: Working to move people in uncertain times”

Second Best Name for a Conference:
“Are Members of our General Assembly Flexible?”

Best Statehouse Legislation:
Pat Pascoe

Best Congressional Representative:
Ben Nighthorse Campbell

Best Denver City Council Representative:
Bill Roberts

Best Bureaucrat:
Wellington Webb

Best Reason to Name a Mountain after Dick Lamm:
Because he’s there—and so are they

Best Move by the Best Bookstore:
Tattered Cover

Best Religious (we think) Columnist:
Vera Vick, “Denver Weekly News”

Best Paula Woodward Report:
The Chia pet

Best Small Talk on a TV Newscast:
Colorado Evening News, 6:30 pm, KCNC Channel 4

Best Local Boy Made Good:
Harry Smith

Best Local Girl Made Good:
Roseanne Barr

Best Performance by a Coloradan on the “Tonight Show”:
Scott Isaacs

SPORTS & RECREATION

Best Place to Plot the Avalanche Paths Around your Mountain Condo:
Colorado Geological Society

Best Retro Description of a Ski Instructor:
“GQ” Magazine

Best Kid’s Ski Area:
Beaver Creek

Best Place to Snowboard:
Purgatory

Best Proof that Ice is Nice:
Denver Curling Club

Best Place to Get Away From it All in the Middle of the City:
Denver Botanic Gardens

Best Place to Take the Kids:
Kid’s Night Out, South Suburban Rec. Center

Best Place to Leave the Kids:
Camp Hyatt, Hyatt Regency Denver

Best Thing to Do in the Dark:
Star Parties, Gates Planetarium

Best View from a City Park:
Inspiration Point

Best Make-Out Spot:
Hut Hill

Best Boy-Watching:
Rude Rec. Center weight room

Best Girl-Watching:
16th St. Mall

Best Place to Meet Swinging Singles:
Kennedy Golf Course

Best Golf Greens and Fairways:
Lakewood Country Club

Best New Miniature Golf Course:
Adventure Golf

Best Theme for a Miniature Golf Course:
Bicentennial Park, Aurora

Holy Smokes! Another Great Miniature Golf Course:
Highlands Ranch

Best Park Improvement:
Par Course, Crown Hill Park

Best New Park:
Meyer Ranch Park, Aspen Park

Best Flyfishing Store:
The Trout Fisher, 2020 S. Parker Rd.

Best Fly-Tying Lessons:
Tom McMillan at the Flyfisher, 252 Clayton

Best Trout Fishing 30 Minutes from Downtown:
Waterton Canyon

Best New Sport for the Handicapped:
Hunting

Best Place for a Picnic:
Lost Gulch Overlook, Flagstaff Mountain, Boulder

Best Road Bike Ride (off season):
Lyons to Allenspark and Estes Park

Best Urban Bike Tour:
Highline Canal

Best In-Town Downhill Rush:
Ruby Hill

Best Cure for Airsickness:
Ultralight demonstration flights, Morning Star Aviation

Best New Party Idea:
Slunking

Best Urban Skateboard Ramp:
19th and Arapahoe

Best Replacement for the Annual Company Picnic:
National Demographics & Lifestyles

Best Biker Group:
Puttin’ Sober

Best Place to Live out Your Lonesome Dove Fantasies:
Lost Valley Ranch, Sedalia

Best Rustic Bed and Breakfast:
The Creed Hotel, Creed

Best Close-Up Look at a Cliff Dwelling:
Ute Mountain Indian Reservation

Best Train Trip–High End:
Private Car Rentals Ansco Investment Co.

Best Train Trip–Low End:
Limon Twilight Limited

Best Place to Get on Track:
Caboose Hobbies

Best Guide to Public Land:
Metro Mountain Recreation and Open Space Project

Lannie Garrett’s Best Place to Work Out:
Oxford Club

Best Bolder Boulder Running Team:
Jogging Jihads

Best Way to Rev Up:
“Race Day Radio Magazine” with Jann Scott, KJIM 760 AM

Best TV Sports Commentator:
Les Shapiro, KCNC Channel 4
Reader’s Poll: Ron Zappolo

Best Nugget:
Fat Lever
Reader’s Poll: Alex English

Best Sports Ripoff:
Colorado ski area lift ticket prices

Best Local Boy Turned Sports Hero:
Tom Chambers

Best Place for Sports Fantasies to Come True:
Paramount Park

Best Place for True-Blue (and Orange) Bronco Fans:
Mr. K’s Bronco Heaven

Best Bronco:
John Elway
Reader’s Poll: John Elway

Best Warning Signs of Waning Broncomania:
Season-ticketholders bailing out

Best Colorado Publication about Chicago Sports:
Chicago SportScene

Best Sports Value:
Denver Zephyrs Businessperson’s Special

Best Sports Consultant:
Robert Regoli, Sports Card Analyst

Best Reason for Denver to Get a Major League baseball team:
To give Denver’s sports journalists something to do in the football off-season

Best Way to Use up Two Tons of Zucchini:
CSU Cooperative Extension

Best Deal for Apple Tree Owners:
Apple Cider Day, Wheat Ridge Historical Park

Best Garden:
Independence House Family

Best Topiary:
1655 Utica St.

Best Colorado Gardener (in Memoriam):
Herb Gundell

ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT

Blinky the Clown’s Best Place to Take the Kids:
Blinky’s Show

Best Free Entertainment on the Pearl St. Mall:
The state’s shortest skirts

Best Free Entertainment on the 16th St. Mall:
The Right Reverend Marlon Brando

Best Free Colorado Entertainment on the Great White Way:
The Palmer High Sextet

Best Festival Commemorating Something that no Longer Exists:
Carbondale Potato Festival

Best Fundraiser:
Suds ‘n’ Duds

Best Prom (tie):
The Estelle S. Studs School of Charm Lesbian Prom; The Bouquets and Backseats Prom

Best New Museum Collection:
Mr. Blackwell Gustafson CSU Dept. of Clothing & Textiles, Ft. Collins

Best House Tour:
Thomas-Billings Home, Central City

Best Odd In-Town Museum:
Sod House

Best Museum to Honor an Old Fad:
The Cube Museum, Grand Junction

Best Monthly Singalongs:
Mark Saiki’s Singalong Group

Best Jukebox:
Seven South

Best Gospel Hour:
Madame Andrews’ Gospel Hour

Best Poetry in Motion:
Poetry Patterns

Best Radio Talk Show Host:
Don Becker, KBXG 710 AM
Reader’s Poll: Mike Rosen

Best Radio Show for the Environmentally Aware:
Terra Infirma, KGNU 88.5 FM

Best Radio Show for the Older Generation:
Concerning Us, hosted by John Lindsay

Best TV Talk Show:
Biff America, KSMT, Breckenridge

Best TV Pitchman:
Bud’s Mufflers

Best Late Night TV Ads:
Channel 31

Best Movie Channel:
Channel 59

Best Performance by a Denver Building in a TV Production:
The old DA’s building

Best Accidental Imitation of Chicago:
Denver

Best Intentional Imitation of Chicago:
Breckenridge

Best Movie Popcorn:
AMC Theaters

Best New Screen:
The Esquire

Best Movie Theatre For Buying Peruvian Headgear:
The former Art Cinema in Boulder

Best Local Producer of Teen Slasher Videos:
First Films

Best New Major:
Film Studies at CU

Best Place to Watch a Dud:
Continental Theatre

Best New Movie Theatre:
Chez Artiste Cinema

Best Multiplex:
Tivoli 12 Theatres

Best Movie Theatre:
The Mayan

Best Movie Scene Filmed in Colorado:
Opening sequence of “Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade”

Best Performance by a Coloradan in a Movie:
Vincent D’Onofrio in “Mystic Pizza”

Best Theatre Entrance:
The Changing Scene

Best Move by a Theatre Group:
SuTeatro’s purchase of the Elyria School

Best New Play:
“Dr. Antonio’s imaginary Disease” by Mike Chappelle

Best Touring Show:
“You Strike the Woman, You Strike the Rock” The Visisizwe Players

Best Musical:
“Carousel” Denver Center Theatre Company

Best Ensemble:
“The Fox” Hunger Artists

Best Supporting Actor:
Stephen Black, “Landscape of the Body” Hunger Artists

Best Supporting Actress:
Leslie Hendrix, “The Matchmaker” Denver Center Theatre Company

Best Actor:
Barry Wallace, “Fun” Boulder Repertory Theatre

Best Actress:
Anne F. Butler, “The Darling” Germinal Stage Denver

Best Production:
“Ma Rainey’s Black Bottom” Studio E Theatre Ensemble

Best New Theatre:
Heatley’s Tea House, 266 S. Downing

Best Director:
Tom Rowen, “landscape of the Body,” Hunger Artists

Best Local Theatre Group:
Hunger Artists

Best Performance Art Event:
George Monchak, Pirate fundraiser

Best Installation:
“Personal Espionage,” by Mark Brasuell, Edge Gallery

Best Seasonal Sculpture:
Laura Audrey’s huge snake

Best Cultural Gallery:
Studio PaNdau, 1825 Blake St.

Best Proof that the Santa Fe Look has Peaked:
Mr. Potato Head, AlphaGallery

Best Art Openings:
Pirate: A Contemporary Art Oasis

Best Art Opening Eats:
News Gallery

Best Alternative Performance Art Performance:
Harry Lyrico, Pirate

Best Museum Show:
“La Antorcha de Quetzacoatl” Leo Tanguma, Denver Art Museum

Best Arts Program for the Sandbox Set:
Arvada Center for the Arts and Humanities

Best News for Local Artists:
Rocky Mountain Women’s Institute

Best Evidence that the DSO Never Learns:
Canceling the season midway

Best Classical Music Group:
The Denver Chamber Orchestra

Best Classical Recital:
Donald Pearson, Bach birthday organ concert at St. John’s Cathedral

Best Musical Ambassador:
Don Ambler

Best Classical Music Series:
KCFR Evenings at 8

Best Band of the Century:
The Denver Municipal Band

Best Classical Radio Program:
Jeanna Wearing, KPOF 910 AM

Best Jazz Radio Station:
KUVO 89.3 FM

Best Bets to Become Jazz Greats:
Day Hoof and UNC Jazz Combo I

Best Commercial Career Move for a Jazz Musician:
Nelson Rangell

Best Artistic Career Move for a Jazz Musician:
Joe Anderies

Best Theme Concert Series:
Gibson’s Fats Waller, Cole Porter, Gershwin and Denver Jazz

Best Jazz Club:
El Chapultepec
Reader’s poll: El Chapultepec

Best Jazz Musician:
Art Lande

Best Jazz Group:
Ron Mile Trio/Quartet
Reader’s poll: Dotsero

Best Collaboration:
Spike Robinson & Rob Mullins “The Odd Couple”

Best New-Age Recording by a Local Artist:
Bill Douglas, “Jewel Lake”

Best Local Recording for Kids:
Michael Stanwood, “Something Awful Can Be Wonderful”

Best Nationally Known Local Label:
Silver Wave

Best Local Rock Record:
The 40th Day, “Something Hidden Here”

Best Original Song:
The Jonez, “Rat-ta-tat-tat”

Best Rock on TV (tie):
“Teletunes” & “The Music Link”

Best Street Musician:
Bill Atkinson
Reader’s poll: Pat Garret

Best Fanzine:
The Core

Best Folkie:
Carla Sciaky

Best Blues Band:
The Last Fair Deal
Reader’s poll: Bob Hornbuckle

Best Underground Band:
Human Head Transplant

Best Thrash Band:
Soak

Best Heavy Metal Band:
Rena Care
Reader’s poll: Squealer

Best in-limbo band:
Shades of Persuasion

Best guitar god:
Mike Serviolo, Jux County

Best Understated Guitar:
Tommy Malone, Subdudes

Best Local Dance Band:
Chris Daniels & the Kings
Reader’s poll (tie): 4 Nikators, Subdudes

Best Local Band with a Conscience:
The Jonez

Best Cover Band:
Laughing Sam’s Dice

Best Longevity in a Local Band:
The Jinns

Best Gyrations:
Tod Wulfmeyer

Best Band for a Laugh:
The Korvettes

Best Band to Watch:
Wanker

Best Band Name:
Nerves Like Eels

Best Alternative Band:
Twice Wilted

Best Band to Hit the Big Time:
The Subdudes

Best Local Rock Band:
Big Head Todd & the Monsters

Best Arena Show of the Year:
Metallica and Queensryche “Damaged Justice” tour

Best Concert of the Year:
Lou Reed, Paramount Theatre
Reader’s poll: Pink Floyd

Best Bimbos:
Fiddler’s Green Pool Party

Best Bouncer:
Michael Jackson

Best Grossout Club Entrance:
Rock Island

Best Club with an Open Mind:
Penny Lane Coffeehouse

Best Club DJ:
Tim Ward, Club Tower

Jake Jabs’ Best Place to Sit In With the Band:
Bo & Eddie’s

Best Open Stage:
Decatur’s Friendship Inn
Reader’s poll: Red Rocks

Best All-Ages Shows:
Aztlan Theatre

Best Club for New Bands:
Tequila Sunrise

Best Lite Metal Club:
Bangles

Best Heavy Metal Club:
Club Maxxx
Reader’s poll: Bangles

Best Club for Original Music:
The Garage at 23 Parrish

Best Dance Club:
23 Parrish
Reader’s poll: Rock Island

Best Reincarnated Concert Hall:
The Boulder Theater

Best Rock Club:
JJ McCabes
Reader’s poll: Ziggie’s

Best Country-Western Bar:
Michael B’s Saloon
Reader’s poll: Zanza Bar

Best Honkytonk:
Coffey’s Korner

Best Slavic Hangout:
Tatra, Highway 38, one mile north of Lyons

Best Piano Bar/Pianist:
Charlie Brown’s/Paul Lopez
Reader’s poll: Ivory

Best Happy Hour Spread:
23 Parrish

Best Happy Hour Hours:
Ogden Street South

Best Elvis Impersonator Who Looks Nothing Like the King:
Louis Ortiz

Best Proof that Elvis Has Risen:
“Church of the Living Elvis” Pantheistic Dictionary exhibit, News Gallery

Best Elvis Poetry in Emotion:
“Elvis, We Still Love You Tender”

Best Moment Commemorating Elvis:
The Future, live at McNichols Arena

Best Elvis Relic in the Denver Police Department:
Jerry Kennedy’s autographed picture of the king

Best New Elvis-Related Project:
Larry Mahan’s Barbecue and Dipping Sauce

Best Gay Bar:
The Compound
Reader’s poll: Charlie’s

Best Student Union:
The Tivoli

Best Sports Bar:
Maxfield & Friends
Reader’s poll: Ironworks

Best Mountain Bar:
The Bucksnort Saloon

Best Comedy Club:
The Bustop
Reader’s poll: Comedy Works

Best Hoser Bar:
Smiling Moose Bar & Grill

Best Teen Club:
Rock Island

Best Thirtysomething Bar:
Wynkoop Brewing Company

Best Neighborhood Bar–Downtown:
The Billabong

Best Neighborhood Bar–East:
The Mozart Lounge

Best Neighborhood Bar–South:
Monaghan’s

Best Neighborhood Bar–West:
Pig ‘n Whistle

Best Neighborhood Bar–Boulder:
West End Tavern

Best Coffeehouse:
Muddy’s Java Café

GOODS AND SERVICES

Best Bargain:
King Soopers one-cent horse ride
Reader’s poll: Ross Dress for Less

Best Birthday Bargain:
Fire House Car Wash

Best Free, Non 976-number:
True Confessions, 777-9754

Best Free Advice This Side of a Bartender:
Thursday Night Bar Program

Best Free Condoms–Day:
Planned Parenthood

Best Free Condoms–Night:
Colorado AIDS Project

Brian Nalty’s Best Rock-and-Roll Hair-Care Tip:
Dax Wax

Best AIDS Service:
AIDS Buyer’s Club

Best AIDS Test:
Wayne Thrasher

Best Blood Bank From a Donor’s Point of View:
Children’s Hospital

Best Menopause Seminar:
Lutheran Medical Center

Best Impotency Seminar:
Lutheran Medical Center

Best True Drug Store:
Tejon Drug Co.

Best Discount Drugstore:
Drug Emporium

Best Convenient Recycling:
King Soopers, all locations

Best Complete Recycler:
Friedman & Sons

Best Place to Get the Straight Poop:
Denise Sims, Up Yours

Best Photo Booth:
Arvada Center for the Arts and Humanities

Best Help for the Terminally Timid:
The Shyness Network

Best Yenta:
Introductions by Ruth

Best Inexpensive Way to Propose:
Mile High Stadium

Best Inexpensive Way to Cater your Wedding:
“Do It Yourself”

Best Cheesy Window Display:
Jerry’s News West

Best Window Display:
Card Blanche
Readers poll: May D&F

Best One-Stop Shopping Binge:
Factory Outlet Mall, Silverthorne

Best Place to Buy Colorado Souvenirs:
Union Station gift shop
Reader’s poll: Woolworth’s

Best Weird Party Favors:
Colorado Party and Novelty

Best Votive Candles and Voodoo Supplies:
El Caridd del Cobre

Best Alchemist:
Adriel

Best Way to Recharge your Batteries:
Isis New Age Center

Best Place to Spend Money and Have Nothing to Show For It on Purpose:
Fads

Best Store for People Who Refuse to Grow Up:
Firecrackers Malt & Burger Shoppe

Best Sign that Colorado’s Economy has Yet to Recover:
Wedgle’s Music and Loan

Best Thrift Shop Trade Triangle:
Family Thrift Center; Goodwill Industries; Value Village

Best Thrift Shop Opening:
Value Village

Best Thrift Store:
Disabled American Veterans Stores
Readers poll: Value Village

Best Antiques for Adventure:
The Antique Zoo

Best Mammy-rabilia:
Darcelle’s Gallery

Best Import Shop:
More for Less

Best Store for African Knickknacks:
Zebra Imports

Best Hobby Store:
Thompson’s Hobbies & Crafts
Reader’s poll: Caboose Hobbies

Best Bead Supply:
Ornamental Resources

Best Necklace-Stringing Stuff:
Maroon Bells

Best Chic Fabric Store:
Buttons ‘n’ Trims

Best Deals on Fabrics:
Fabric Outlet

Best Bracelets Made from Wolf Fur:
Kent Weber, Mission: Wolf

Best Way to Imitate Pepe Lepew:
Arnold’s Furs, Cedaredge

Best Colorado Jewelry—High End:
Chipita

Best Colorado Jewelry—Low End:
Liz’art

Best June Cleaver Decorating Accessories:
Flashback

Best Vintage Cowboy Furniture and Decorations:
Crybaby Ranch

Best Biker Maternity Togs:
Rocky Mountain Harley Davidson

Best Toy Store Without Barbie and G.I. Joe:
Follow Your Heart

Best Unpretentious Kid’s Clothing:
My Kids Clothes

Best Vintage (also best singing cowboy clothes):
Poparama
Reader’s poll: Poparama

Best Place to Buy Spurs:
Miller Stockman

Best Rock & Roll/Bondage Shoes:
The Wild Pair

Best Place to Foot the Bill:
Sox Appeal

Best Place to Buy Pantyhose:
TJ Maxx

Best Washable Leather Bustiers:
Pollyanna

Best Innovative Colorado Designers:
Ragazzi

Best Place to Buy a Ceremonial Robe:
Mesa Imports

Best Do-Rags—Price:
Woolworth’s

Best Do-Rags—Selection:
Tapestry

Best Deal on Synthetic Hair:
PriceMart Beauty Supply

Best Rock-and-Roll Tattooing:
Tattooing by Mickie

Best Repair Job When your Hair’s Been Ruined:
Staxx Salon

Best Old-Time Barbershop:
Bob’s

Best Tanning Salon:
The Beach

Best Place to Get a Tan the Natural Way:
Inverness Golf Course

Best Quick Shoe Repair:
Cobbler’s Corner

Best Solution for the Terminally Messy:
Launderama Club

Best Location for a Church:
Base-Mar Shopping Center, Boulder

Best Pet Service for Couch Potatoes:
Aqua Imports, Boulder

Best Colorado Kitty Litter:
Litter Kit

Best Deal on Pet Immunizations:
Wadsworth Veterinary Clinic

Best Hands-Off Way to Walk Your Dog:
Jordan Walkers

Best Canine Toenail Clipping:
Ansel Walters, Pet Ranch

Best Guilt-Free Mouse Supply:
Tropic Seas Pet Store

Best Place to Take Your Pet When Your Vet Can’t Help:
Colorado State University Teaching Hospital, Fort Collins

Best Way to Survive Your Pet’s Demise:
Pet Loss Support Group, Denver Dumb Friends League

Best Way to Go:
The Monarch Society

Best Coffins:
Anna Koop, Catholic Worker House

Best Cheap Travel Course:
Jim Emery

Best Ride from the Airport:
Blackjack Limo

Best Limo Driver:
Peter Fair, TCG Limousines

Best Gas Station:
Conoco, Speer at Zuni

Best Place to Buy Gas:
Hampden and Yosemite

Best Deal on Wheels:
Lemon-Aid of America

Second Best Deal on Wheels:
Automotive Mobile Diagnostic Service

Best Female Automotive Aid:
Mary Jackson, “Women on Wheels”

Best Phone Answering Machine Repair Service:
A-V Service

Best Truly Affordable Alternative to Public School and Daycare:
Chaslou Academy

Best Financial Institution:
The Young Americans Bank

Best Post Office:
The Terminal Annex

Best Undiscovered Post Office:
May D&F’s Bargain Basement

Best Apartment Managers:
Bob and Pat Albach, Casa Cordova Apartments

Best Salvage Yard:
Blake’s Small Car Salvage, Erie

Best Place to Find a Good Screw:
A&I Bolt and Nut

Best Lumberyard:
Little Guy Lumber Company

Best Furniture Knockoffs:
Avis Upholstery Studio

Best Plumbing Bargains:
Do-It-Ur-Self Plumbing & Heating

Best Replacement Tiles:
Capco

Best Place to Buy a Used Sledgehammer:
Charlie’s 2nd Hand Store Inc.

Best Mac-Doctor Making Housecalls:
Gerritt Dunn

Best Commodore Computer Repair:
The Commodore Connection

Best Computer Store:
CW Electronics
Reader’s poll: CW Electronics

Best-Named Computer Store:
User Friendly

Best Shoplifting Spies:
Anne Droid Mannequin, Restoration

Best Place to Hire a Business Snitch:
Caldwell & Associates

Best Head Shop:
Heads of State
Reader’s poll: Trails

Best Emergency Preparedness Equipment:
Harloff Manufacturing Company’s “Response Carts”

Best Library for Former Employees with a Mission:
Oil, Chemical and Atomic Workers International Union Library

Best Business Library:
Auraria Library

Best Jungian Cards and Calendars:
Barbara Stone

Best Women’s Bookstore:
The Bookgarden: A Women’s Store

Best Used Bookstore:
Capitol Hill Books
Readers poll: Capitol Hill Books

Best Book Sale:
Denver Public Library

Best Metaphysical Bookstore:
Metaphysical Books

Best Trucker’s Delight:
Falcon Books and Video

Best Porno Arcade Bargain:
Pleasures Broadway Bookstore

Best Video Store:
Across the Trax
Reader’s poll: King Soopers

Best Guitarman:
Chris Herbert, Longenecker Guitars

Best Hollywood-opening-style Searchlights:
Fastlane Productions’ Sky-Tracker

Best Used Record Store:
Albums on the Hill
Reader’s poll: Wax Trax

Best Record Store Flashback:
JB&H Records & Tapes

Best News for Bass Players:
First Bass

Best Deadhead Cakes:
Haagen Dazs, Crossroads Mall, Boulder

Best Bakery:
Gateaux

Best Organic Convenience Store:
Wild Oats Market

Best Convenience Store:
7-Eleven
Reader’s poll: 7-Eleven

Best Deal on Spices:
The Spice Company

Best Wine Store—Value:
Applejack Liquors

Best Wine Store—Quality:
The Vineyard

Best Selection of Non-Alcoholic Wines:
Arrow Liquormart

Best Beer Bargains:
Logan Liquors

Best Freebies:
The Coffee Nut

Best Seasonal Local Drink:
Royal Crest Egg Nog

Best Fruit and Vegetable Stand:
Garramone Produce Co.
Reader’s poll: Farmer’s Market at Market Street Station

Best Homegrown Candy:
Enstrom’s Toffee

Best Political Statement by a Grocery Store:
Alfalfa’s

Best Place to Buy Sheep Heads:
King Soopers

Best Use of Produce:
Cub Foods

Best Supermarket Banter:
Safeway

Best Grocery Store:
Orchard Market
Reader’s poll: King Soopers

Best Pigs:
Registered Wenglar Red Waddle Roger Thayer, Montrose

Best Pig on a Menu:
Pig On A Bun, Eddie Bohn’s Pig ‘N’ Whistle Motel

Best Dubious Pig Distinction:
Kersey, Colorado

Best Piggy Bank:
The Public Market at Aurora

Best Yard Pigs:
Mile-Hi Statuary

FOOD AND DRINK

Best Restaurant Owned by a Former Game Show Host:
Saloon, Breckenridge

Best View from a Fast-Food Restaurant:
Taco Bell

Best View from a Snack Bar:
Buffalo Bill Museum

Best-Stocked Restaurant Bathroom:
Strings

Best Restroom Service:
Ron Coleman, 23 Parrish

Best Restaurant for Illicit Romantic Activities:
The Bay Wolf

Perhaps Not Coincidentally, Best Toothbrushes in a Restaurant:
The Bay Wolf

Best Place to Take Someone Else’s Spouse:
Rodney’s

Best Restaurant for a Romantic Dinner:
Gabriel’s, Sedalia

Best-Dressed Waiters:
New Saigon

Best Waiters’ Shirts this side of NYC:
Spanky’s

Best Busboy:
Matt Jones, Juanita’s

Best Waitperson:
Dino, Little Pepina’s

Best All-American Waitresses:
Duffy’s

Best Calendar Collection:
Bud’s Drive-In

Best Cleavage on a Menu:
La Fiesta

Best Cleavage, RIP:
The Canterbury Inn

Best Decor Guaranteed to Inspire Middle-Aged Men:
Ruby

Best Romantic Decor:
Amethyst Room at Cliff Young’s

Best Sleek Decor:
Lincoln 100

Best Restaurant Art:
Wynkoop Brewing Company

Best Chalkboard Drawings:
Chili’s

Best Buffalo Paraphernalia (not just on the plate):
Mountain Man Steak House

Best Waffle:
Gov. Roy Romer

Best Waffles:
D Wesley’s Restaurant

Best Cheap Breakfast:
Park Lane Café

Best Country Breakfast:
Karen’s Bakery, Village Square, Louisville

Best Way to Retrieve a Day that Started out Wrong:
El Taco de Mexico

Best Pig-Out Sunday Brunch:
Boulderado Hotel

Best healthy breakfast:
The Harvest

Best Cheap Lunch for Seniors:
Any Denver public elementary school

Best Place to Eat Instead of the East High Cafeteria:
Gyros Place

Best Cheap Lunch:
Carol’s Soup Kitchen

Best Unexpected Lunch Spot:
Shivers at the Icehouse

Best Tea Room:
The Rose Tea Room

Best Non-Traditional High Tea:
Broadway Lites

Best Dinner Under $5:
McCormick’s Fish House and Bar
Reader’s poll: Brick Oven Beanery

Best Delicious, Nutritious Dinner in a Bowl, Under $5:
Thai Hiep

Best Sunday Dinner:
Weldon’s

Best Late Night Meal:
Chives American Bistro
Reader’s poll (tie): Village Inn, Paris on the Platte

Best Place for Coffee and Great City Blues All Night Long:
The Doll House

Best Drive-In:
Sonic Drive-In

Best Greasy Spoon:
Butcher Block II

Best Outdoor Cafe:
El Noa Noa
Reader’s poll: Paramount

Best Food Court:
Plaza Court Emporium

Best Food Cart on the Mall:
Burrito Terrace
Readers poll: Classic Coffee Cart

Best Popcorn Stand:
Queen City Popcorn

Best Place to Take the Kids:
Show Biz Pizza

Best Place to Take the Kids and Still Have an Adult Time:
Racine’s

Best Place for Kids to Monkey Around With Their Food:
The Children’s Museum

Best Children’s Menu:
Wheat Ridge Dairy and Bakery

Best Reason Not to Bitch about the Cultural District Tax:
T-Rex Cafe, Denver Museum of Natural History

Best Alternative to Hospital Food:
Blue House Tea Room

Best Restaurant Recovery:
The Blue Parrot Restaurant

Best Take-Out Food:
Sapp Brothers Truck Stop

Best Truck Stop:
Lance’s Chuck Wagon

Best Delicatessen:
Goldie’s
Reader’s poll: Goldie’s

Best Take-Out Deli:
FBC Foods

Best Fresh Vegetables at Your Fingertips:
Colorado Farm Fresh Directory

Best Ethnic Cooperation:
Pete’s Fruits and Vegetables

Best Vegetarian Food:
Govinda’s, Radha Krsna Temple

Best Place to Slip Back into the Seventies:
Avagadro’s Number

Best ABC Chocolate Fix:
Colorado Mud

Best ABC Way to Get Kids to Eat Sprouts:
The “Wee Sprouts” Edible Toy

Best ABC Way to Clear Your Sinuses:
Sahnana’s Native Mustseed Sauce

Best ABC Salsa:
Singing Pig Salsa

Best ABC Honey:
Paul Hendricks

Best Health Food:
Greens

Best Unexpectedly Healthy Food:
New York Connection

Best Salad Bar:
Denver Salad Company
Reader’s poll: Healthy Habits

Best Bread to Go:
Great Harvest Bakery

Best Greads to Eat In:
Tante Louise

Best Apple Dumpling:
Gaylord’s Deli and Catering

Best Bread Pudding:
Transalpin

Best Cookie Bargain:
Blue Chip Cookies

Best Desserts:
Calvin’s Before & After
Reader’s poll: Marie Callenders

Best Chocolate Dessert:
The Negrita, The Fort

Best Wine List:
Flagstaff House

Best Beer List:
Old Chicago

Best Frogs’ Legs List:
New Saigon

Best Legal Rush:
Thai coffee to go, Tommy’s Oriental

Best Deal on Cappuccino:
The Brown Bag

Best Donuts:
Henderson’s Donut House

Best Frou-Frou Drink:
The Beach Grill
Reader’s poll: Deep Throat at the Punchbowl

Best Gourmet Takeout:
Discriminating Palate

Best Chicken Noodle Soup To Go:
Healthy Habits

Best BLT:
Avenue Bar & Grill

Best French Fries:
Annie’s Cafe
Reader’s poll: McDonalds

Best Potato Salad:
Continental Delicatessen

Best Onion Rings:
Luther’s Bar-B-Q

Best Pizza:
The Wazee Supper Club
Reader’s poll: Bonnie Brae

Best Specialty Pizza:
The spinach slice at Armando’s of Cherry Creek

Best Delivery of a Certified Pizza:
Domino’s

Best Hot Beef Sandwich:
Gray’s Café

Best Sandwiches:
Maria’s Bakery
Readers poll (tie): Goldie’s, Subway

Best Hotdogs:
The Dog House
Readers poll: Mustard’s Last Stand

Best Burger:
J.B. Winberie
Readers poll (tie): Wendy’s, My Brother’s Bar

Best FGB:
My Brother’s Bar

Best Burger After Midnight:
Oinks Diner,

Best Sausages, Occidental:
Wynkoop Brewing Company

Best Sausages, Oriental:
Chao Praya

Best Steakhouse:
Morton’s of Chicago

Best Fried Chicken:
Foucher’s Creole Cafe
Reader’s poll: Kentucky Fried Chicken

Best Cheap Steak:
Club 404

Best Chicken-Fried Steak:
The Broken Spoke

Best Barbecue:
M & D’s Barbecue and Fish Palace
Reader’s poll: Bennett’s

Best White Trash Food:
Furr’s Cafeteria
Reader’s poll: Black-Eyed Pea

Best Soul Food:
Pierre’s Supper Club
Reader’s poll: Daddy Bruce’s

Best Seafood:
Mostly Seafood
Reader’s poll: Mostly Seafood

Best Oysters:
McCormick’s Fish House and Oyster Bar

Best Fish & Chips:
Yorkshire Fish & Chips

Best Fried Calamari:
La Petite Spain

Best Paella:
Don Quijote

Best South American Food:
Cafe Brazil

Best Southwestern Food:
Las Brisas

Best Chips and Salsa:
Rosa Linda Mexican Cafe
Reader’s poll: Blue Bonnet Café

Best Breakfast Burrito:
Unidos Café

Best Nachos:
Juanita’s Uptown

Best Mexican To Go:
Chubby’s

Best Green Chile:
Brewery Bar II
Reader’s poll: Chubby’s

Best Chile Relleno:
Rosa Linda Mexican Cafe
Reader’s poll: La Fiesta

Best Chimichanga:
Sportsman’s II

Best Burrito:
El Tepehuan
Reader’s poll: Chubby’s

Best Taco:
Mexico City Lounge
Reader’s poll: Taco Bell

Best Bar Mex That’s Moved Into the Big Time:
Benny’s Place

Best Mexican Restaurant:
La Casa De Manuel
Reader’s poll: Blue Bonnet Café

Best Russian Restaurant:
Little Russian Tea Room

Best Indian Restaurant:
India’s

Best Middle Eastern Restaurant:
Cedars

Best Greek Restaurant:
Voula’s
Reader’s poll: It’s Greek to Me

Best Place to Practice Speaking German with Your Mouth Full:
Karl’s F.F. Delicatessen

Best Cheap Italian To Go:
Pasta Jay’s

Best Italian Classico:
Little Pepina’s

Best Italian Nouvella:
Olive Oil
Reader’s poll: Al Fresco’s

Best French Restaurant:
European Cafe
Reader’s poll: Le Central

Best Thai Restaurant:
J’s Noodles
Reader’s poll: J’s Noodles

Best Cha Gio:
Kim Ba

Best Vietnamese Restaurant:
Long Binh
Reader’s poll: T-Wa’s

Best Sushi with Shrine:
Sushi Tora
Reader’s poll: Sushi Den

Best Gyoza:
Daylight Donuts

Best Japanese Restaurant—Low End:
Don Don
Reader’s poll: Kokoro

Best Japanese Restaurant—High End:
Samurai

Best Dim Sum:
China Terrace

Best Chinese Restaurant:
The Panda Cafe
Reader’s poll: Imperial

Best Eclectic—Oriental:
Chez Thoa

Best Eclectic—Occidental:
John’s

Best Restaurant On Its Way Up:
Zenith, The Tivoli

Best New Restaurant:
The Panda
Reader’s poll: Weldon’s

Best Restaurant When Someone Else is Paying:
Flagstaff House, Boulder

Best of Everything Combined:
Strings