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This week, Loveland City Manager Bill Cahill reportedly banned a series of words and phrases from official communication — mostly meaningless terms such as “orientate,” “proactive,” “paradigm” and (!) “skillage.” It’s a good start — but it turns out Lake Superior State University in Sault Ste. Marie, Michigan, has been doing something similar since 1976. Here are our ten faves from the LSSU list, photo-illustrated for your pleasure. Check them out — but for God’s sake, don’t say them!
Number 10: “Pet parent” — although in this case, it’s not so bad, since there definitely is a resemblance….
Number 9: “Captured alive” — because capturing someone dead isn’t really much of a challenge.
Click to keep counting down our top ten phrases Loveland should outlaw next.
Number 8: “Giving 110 percent.” If you actually figure out a way to give more than 100 percent, your math teacher’s head will explode.
Number 7: “Thrown under the bus.” After all, wouldn’t getting thrown under a steamroller be even worse?
Click to keep counting down our top ten phrases Loveland should outlaw next.
Number 6: “Completely surrounded” — as opposed to being surrounded in a way that makes it easy to escape?
Number 5: “Tuna fish.” Without that second word, it could be a “Tuna bird,” or a “Tuna cow,” or maybe a “Tuna platypus.”
Click to keep counting down our top ten phrases Loveland should outlaw next.
Number 4: “The honest truth” — a phrase that can also be interpreted as “I’m lying, but doing it with a really sincere look on my face.”
Number 3: “Bare naked” — unless the expression “Fully clothed naked” is more common than we realize.
Click to keep counting down our top ten phrases Loveland should outlaw next.
Number 2: “LOL” and every other text-abbreviation cliche with the exception of “WTF” — because, as Phil from Modern Family reminds us, it actually means, “Why the face?”
Number 1: “We’re pregnant.” Until you squeeze a baby out of your private parts, pal, I’m pretty sure you’re using the wrong pronoun.
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More from our Lists & Weirdness archive: “Bizarre classroom posters from the ’70s, Part 4: School’s out!“
