Money’s tight, times are hard, here’s your fucking Christmas card. Given all the bad news, I’m having trouble getting in the holiday spirit this year — so I’m making an effort to get out of the house and spend time with friends rather than stay at home fretting. Still, even…
When I woke up after a long evening at the bar at Spago in the Ritz-Carlton in Beaver Creek, I had an e-mail from Scotty, the bartender. “Thank you for gracing my bar last night,” it read. “Truly a pleasure to meet you. I always have a good time working…
Kokopelli’s may have been my least favorite bar in Denver. The service was awful and the space so dark and dirty, you couldn’t have paid me to eat anything coming out of the kitchen. So I was glad to know that something, anything, had replaced it — even if I…
I learned the joy of eating at the bar at Cafe des Artistes on the upper west side of Manhattan. I was in my early twenties, and Doug, an older colleague, insisted on buying me dinner every two to three weeks because he said he loved my stories of poverty,…
Oxymoron, or just moron? I’m trying to adopt a Great Dane that I want to rename Tiny — or, if I’m willing to spend the rest of his life explaining his name, Chopine (that’s a bottle of Bordeaux containing a third the volume of a standard bottle of wine). I’ve…
What would Chelsea Handler do? I’m a huge fan of Chelsea, and recently saw her at a benefit performance for NewGenesis, a wonderful organization that provides a transitional community for the homeless (www.panhandlingsucks.com). Although I’m not nearly as funny as Chelsea, we have other things in common. For example, we…
Fall is my favorite season. I love the warm, sunny days and the cool, crisp nights, the quintessential autumn-in-Colorado experience of experiencing all four seasons — heat, cold, rain, snow — in one day. But most of all, I love Indian summer, when I can sit on one of my…
Many people tell me they dislike sake. When I mention sake to neophytes, they complain that it’s just hot turpentine served in small, white vases — or, worse, that concoction of bad sake and Chambord called Purple Haze. But saying you don’t like sake based on this dreck is like…
Some locations seem jinxed, most notably 410 East Seventh Avenue. Just a block away from such neighborhood powerhouses as Benny’s and Govnr’s Park, this spot would seem like a gimme for any restaurateur. At one point, it was home to the infamous Sacre Bleu, where I spent far too many…
Wonder twin powers activate! Shape of an agave plant. Form of a hangover. At Lime XS, I recently met up with Dave Elger, who’s launched MuchoTE Tequila with his brother, Will. Born in Mexico City but now based in Denver, the twins have taken on the super-heroic task of making…
I’d actually forgotten how much I both love and hate election years. Hate: I’ve been tasting my shoelaces a lot these days, since I keep putting my feet in my mouth. I’d just assumed that most of my friends would find Sarah Palin’s ultra-religious, conservative social views as despicable as…
Although I’m an aficionado of almost every kind of alcohol, I’m not much of a beer drinker. There are only a few circumstances when I enjoy a cold beer: while watching a baseball game, after a really hard day of skiing, on a boat, paired with sake, and when I’m…
The Berkshire is pretty direct about its love of pork products. The brunch menu includes the quote “I put bacon on my bacon,” and a brilliant yet unintelligible line from Elvis written between the men’s and women’s bathrooms reads, “I like pork chops and country ham, creamed potatoes, stuff like…
Jump on the bandwagon! Others may bitch about the traffic and inconvenience, but I’m incredibly enthusiastic about the Democratic National Convention coming to town, almost apoplectic at the idea of Denver being the center of the country. Maybe this is a holdover from my time living in New York City;…
I grew up in Denver and remember seeing the Billy’s Inn sign at the corner of 44th and Lowell forever — but somehow, I’d never made it inside this iconic bar. The building got its start as a service station in the ’20s; in 1933, Billy and Judy Smith turned…
When I was a teenager looking for trouble, my friends and I would head down to Larimer Square, then the only thing happening at night downtown, and sometimes even venture past the 1400 block of Larimer Street. A naïve suburbanite still in braces, I was always shaken at how quickly…
Sitting down for a late Sunday brunch on the patio at Hamburger Mary’s, I hear the cute boy next to me say, “My penis isn’t curved — in fact, it’s the only straight thing on me.” And instantly, I realize that I’m at the center of the universe for extraordinary…
When I heard that the owners of the Candlelight Tavern had taken over the Kentucky Inn, it reminded me of The Parent Trap, the movie about identical twins who are separated shortly after birth when their parents divorce, meet as teens at summer camp, and begin plotting to reunite their…
The block of Broadway just below Ellsworth is suddenly my favorite block in town. Last month, Delite opened next door to Deluxe, quenching my thirst for a wonderful, comfortable bar where I could continue the evening after a great dinner. And then Beatrice & Woodsley sprouted next to Delite. From…
I was in France a few months ago, and just about choked when I discovered the cocktail I’d ordered cost $40. At that moment, I decided that I would not go back to Europe until the dollar is significantly stronger against the euro. Fortunately, we’re lucky to have a little…
Several of my friends are known for their favorite cocktail. There’s Matt, who drinks Ketel One and still water — and drinks it so often that we’ve named it the Keeney-tini. There’s Ellen, who drinks Cosmos made with Stoli Ohranj, no lime and no lime juice. And then there’s Deb,…
Sweeter than honey, Zio Romolo’s Alley Bar is an absolute beehive of activity. Named after Tony Pasquini’s favorite uncle, it’s tucked beside the Pasquini’s location in Highland and is surprisingly comfortable, particularly considering this spot was once a working alleyway. The small space features a tin ceiling, an original Coca-Cola…
