Loud motorcycle, muffled manhood. Recently a group of my friends decided to meet for brunch, ideally in a spot with a great outdoor patio where we could enjoy the glorious weather. Tired of our normal routine, we hit on El Noa Noa, a Mexican mainstay that dates back to long…

When a woman over the age of thirty asks where she and her single friends should go for a drink, I always suggest Capital Grille. Yes, I know I’ve derided chain restaurants time and again, but for some reason, upscale steakhouse chains don’t have the same taint (don’t get me…

For me, venturing into Northfield was like entering Dante’s ninth circle of Hell. I don’t like malls or chain stores, and Ling & Louie’s promise to deliver “an East meets West love story told in food” did not bode well. But the happy hour that runs from 4 to 7…

Ode to a patio: I think that I shall never see/A patio as lovely when drinking Chablis. Or better yet, tequila. After the miserable winter we’ve endured, I’ve got the worst case of spring fever in the history of the world. While many people get out their Rollerblades, hiking shoes…

Life after death. I’m sure it’s no coincidence that the owners of Vita, the Italian restaurant that opened in part of the old Olinger Mortuary in December, named their place after the Italian word for “life.” The interior is certainly lively enough, with its exposed brick, dark wood, leather booths…

I often wonder if New Orleans boosters rue the day that a bartender invented the Hurricane, the city’s most popular cocktail. Prior to August 2005, when I thought of New Orleans, I thought of Mardi Gras, Jazzfest, Bourbon Street, bead-throwing, boob-showing and Hurricanes at Pat O’Brien’s — in that order…

Warm hut, cold heart. While skiing at Winter Park, I stopped at Sunspot — a gorgeous log-and-stone “lodge” with amazing panoramic views of the Continental Divide — for a toe warmer, otherwise known as a hot alcoholic beverage. But while this cozy area looked like the quintessential ski-resort bar, with…

To say the PS Lounge is just a dive bar is like saying a limo is just a car, or a lion is just a cat. There’s no question that the PS Lounge is a dive — but the fact is, it might be Denver’s greatest dive. It has everything…

Heaven on the 27th floor? I can only imagine what it’s like to work in a hotel bar. On a good day, you’re dealing with some heavy hitter with a sizable expense account who, after being over-served, might over-tip with the company credit card. But on most days, you’re serving…

I never imagined that Danny DeVito and I would have anything in common other than our adoration of George Clooney, but after seeing DeVito’s bad behavior on The View recently, I felt a kinship with him that I never expected to experience. “I knew it was the last seven Limoncellos…

Mama, please let your babies grow up to be cowboys. I’ve always had a thing for cowboys, so I should have known we were in trouble when we sat down in the Cowboy Bar — a temporary saloon that sets up in the Hall of Education basement during every Stock…

“You’re invited December 31 to the rawest fucking New Year’s Eve party! Leave the expensive hype and boring shit to the amateurs…bounce your ass all over the dance floor.” I’m willing to bet that this is not how Dick Clark envisions a “rockin’ New Year’s Eve.” In fact, the only…

Islamorada Fish Company 7970 East 49th Avenue 720-385-3600 Last weekend I really needed a change of scenery, but I got stuck working. So a friend and I headed to the Bass Pro Shop — which, while technically still in Denver, might as well be on the moon for most of…

You’re getting sleepy. There’s nothing more disappointing than loving a restaurant but hating the service — as my recent visit to Snooze so sadly showed. I knew we’d have to wait for a table during Sunday’s prime brunch hours, especially after the eatery appeared on an episode of The Real…

Like the beer! When I lived in Manhattan, I had a friend named Michael Jackson. Whenever he introduced himself, people would ask: “Where’s your glove?” or “Where’s Bubbles the Chimp?” or “Can you moon-walk?” Local comedian/ sportswriter Sam Adams has taken advantage of his famous name (trust me, people aren’t…

When a drag queen starts talking about her inner bitch, you know it’s time for a cocktail. There are other good times for cocktails, of course, but it would be hard to top Tuesday night at Lannie’s Clocktower Cabaret, when the hilariously funny “Demented Divas” take the stage at the…

With a name like Aphrotini, I was fearful this contender in the T-Zero Signature Drink Contest would contain some weird, curly ingredient. But I quickly learned that the cocktail — concocted by Trilogy bartender Blair Young — referred not to the Afro hairstyle, but to the word “aphrodisiac.” And then…

A few weeks ago, as part of my warmup for the Denver Film Festival, I headed to Starz FilmCenter for a training session with a heavy independent film. But first I stopped by the concession stand, where I was delighted to find a bar. Actually, to call it a “bar”…

A significant part of my childhood consisted of sitting with my family in front of a large, wood-enshrined television watching shows like I Dream of Jeannie and Gunsmoke while eating TV dinners on TV trays and drinking Grape Nehi. As I sat on the orange shag carpet of my suburban…

Chi is supposed to be part of everything that exists, a life force or spiritual energy, translated literally as “air” or “breath.” And Chi Bistro has certainly breathed new life into the old Las Margaritas space on Old South Gaylord. The Asian-influenced room, with its clean lines and minimalist design,…

The bar at Aix was intended more as a convivial place to wait for a table than a place where you’d hang out all night. Even so, I love to sit and sip in this lovely, calming space. And when I recently stopped by for a little boisson alcoolisée (that’s…

My mother thinks I waste too much time hanging out in bars, but she doesn’t realize how much knowledge I gain by chatting up bartenders and resident barflies. At Cap City Tavern, for instance, I learned that if you put salt on your cocktail napkin, it will prevent the napkin…