Pat Boone, that icon of pure American goodness, has partnered up with a Colorado Springs company on a line of Pat Boone All-American Meats and will start selling his “delicious, tender, juicy, USDA, hand-trimmed, aged beef” on November 1. Here’s the official word from the All-American website:…
What do you get when you cross a hippie with no grooming habits with someone who wants to loiter at your business all day? A slacker who won’t stick around once you increase your prices. Natalie Gonzales, a San Francisco McDonald’s franchise owner, was tired of the underworked and undersanitized…
Consumer Reports takes on fast-food burgers in its October issue, and the results aren’t good for the world’s burger behemoth. The magazine asked 28,000 subscribers for their opinion on fast-food burgers, and McDonald’s came in last — by a margin much larger than a clown nose. The highest-rated burgers? A…
Got milk? Clarissa Bradford took her family, including a five-month-old son, to a McDonald’s in Phoenix , and while the rest of the family noshed on the dollar menu, she pulled out a breast to feed the nipple nibbler. At which point, the manager on duty asked them to leave…
Fortunately, England is not in the Banana Belt, because Fran Dando, a 21-year-old resident of Hastings in East Sussex, has a rare phobia: a fear of bananas. When she was seven, her brother played a practical joke by placing the phallic fruit in her bed. She “felt this horrible, slimy…
We thought we’d seen everything at McDonald’s, but the new “Mouthwatering Angus Snack Wrap” — essentially a burger in a flour tortilla — looks like a new low. Until you consider some of the dishes that the Clown of Darkness has inflicted on the rest of the world. Herewith, the…
What do you get when you cross a baby, a tire and a locust’s ravenous appetite? A munchkin who’d make baby Godzilla blush with envy. Lei Lei carries forty pounds on his ten-month-old frame, and weighs what a healthy six-year-old might weigh. His girth has earned him a nickname, “the…
Cornell University is known for its high-minded academic research, but it also has its hand in some randier projects. For example, professor Michael Lynn recently published a research paper on how a waitress’s appearance affects her tips, according to this report on Restaurant Hospitality. Lynn, who’d previously reported on “Race…
Baltimore’s Andrew Palmer is one cunning con, who had a slick scam going to grab some free grub. Palmer had been hitting the nicer restaurants in town as a solo diner, and when the bill was dropped on his table, he suddenly claimed he was having a seizure — think…
In the small town of Newport, Oregon, residents were suddenly startled by the extra benefit of the pink shrimp that they’d bought in local markets: It glowed in the dark…
When you think of porn, do the images popping into your sex-deprived skull remind you of the time you nailed that hot sorority chick, or perhaps when you were dressed in nothing but a smile and opened the door to the casa of love? Hold on to those warm and…
A water park in Dale City, Virginia, got some unwanted pool accessories over the weekend: a heap of fast food and furniture. The vandals started flinging food, trash and furniture into the pool sometime after the last lifeguard left late Friday night — trespassing, and also violating the Waterworks rule…
A South Carolina woman who thought her car was running “rugged” late last week took the vehicle to a local mechanic — and what he found did not ease her anxiety pangs. As the mechanic ran a diagnostic check, he was surprised to find a cheeseburger and pickle at the…
What do you get when you mix food from Burger King and a trip to the bathroom? An extended stay in the stall. An unidentified man was found dead in the men’s room at a Burger King in Beaumont, Utah. According to Jeff Curl of the Beaumont police, there was…
To borrow a line from Snoopy, it was a dark and stormy night and without any dinner, it was gonna be a hungry night, too. Ted and I were camping last weekend in the Sangre de Cristo Mountains just south of Canon City, in the middle of bear country, and…
The Arabian deserts have brought us riches like oil — and, well, that’s about it. But all that will change when Dubai starts exporting one of its most valued treasures: camel milk. Camels are renowned for their nasty tempers and foul breath. Plus, they have a habit of spitting, just…
You need a greeting card to show how much you care, but you want to send something that the recipient will cherish for days, if not hours. So you walk up and down the miles of aisles at the local Hallmark store, searching for that special card that will bond…
A recent CNN investigation uncovered a dirty little secret about the difference between Chicken McNuggets in this country and their British counterparts: BP may be polluting the Gulf, but the Brits are at least getting chemicals out of their food. McNuggets in the USA were found to contain an “anti-foaming…
Suzanne C. O’Neill, an assistant professor with the Cancer Control Program at Lombardi Comprehensive Cancer Center at Georgetown University, has co-authored a study whose finding is the non-surprising: We’ll use any excuse we can. Her research found that the least healthy people surveyed excused their unhealthy lifestyles by saying they…
The smart people at the Rudd Center for Food Policy and Obesity at Yale University just delivered a brand-spankin’ new study that shows a correlation between licensed cartoon characters and kids’ affinity for snacks. A motley crew of forty munchkins between the ages of four and six was subjected to…
Man V. Food guy, no shot; the fat baldie who eats it all, nada. Anthony Bourdain? No way — although Paula Deen might have a chance. What is it that these culinary whizzes won’t dare do? They wouldn’t go near these creations cooked up by lunatics. For example, the blog…
Wendy’s, which touts its “real” food, had a real mess on its hands at a Kalamazoo, Michigan outlet when a fight broke out after an order wasn’t filled correctly. Officers were called to the scene, where they “encountered a loud disturbance between unsatisfied customers and frustrated employees inside the business,”…
