Why we’ll miss the Westminster Mall

Eating lunch at Olive Garden (and I will say only that my regrettable choice to dine at the Olive Garden was both predicated heavily on free breadsticks and not worth it) after a trip to Toys ‘R’ Us to get a remote-control helicopter and some LEGOs on Saturday, I was…

Twitter Tuesday: Hunx shows you his, so show him yours

In this special edition of Twitter Tuesday, we’re highlighting the perverse and artistic Twitter work of Hunx, leader of bratty throwback band Hunx and his Punx. Whether you’re a fan, a fag hag (like myself) or just a curious reader, Hunx’s daily entries about food, sex on the road (his…

Gettin’ Crafty: For your mama

For all those who give pom-pom critters for birthdays, feel an urge to stick googly eyes on everything or just occasionally get a twitch to fold some origami, we bring you “Gettin’ Crafty” where we feature a craft you can easily make with minimal supplies and limited finances. For all…

Comics are king in our new-release picks for May 3, 2011

With Free Comic Book Day going down this Saturday, it’s clear that comic book retailers and publishers want to put out some of their best this week in preparation for the inevitable high traffic that will be going down across the nation today. Case in point: Three of our five…

President Obama is dead? Your moment of lulz

Admittedly, “Obama” and “Osama” are pretty similar names, so you can understand slipping up a little — the big difference, really, is that one of them normally gets “president” in front of it, while the other is followed by “bin laden.” Also, the former would probably be unlikely to declare…

Our Commercial Culture: Big Rock Gets Nutragious

Who doesn’t love puns? Here’s a commercial that banks on the obvious answer to that question: Nobody doesn’t love puns. Everyone loves puns. If you disagree, then you simply haven’t found the right pun yet. It will come to you, don’t worry. Perhaps that perfect pun is just around the…

Indie Wearable Craft: A harmonic convergence of personal style

Over the weekend, I visited the first Indie Wearable Craft urban market, a three-day pop-up bazaar hosted by a select group of local designers, including Jil Cappuccio, Kirsten Coplans of Pearl Clothing and Christina Patzman of Darling Ruth, among others. Their collective bag is cross-merchandising, and they’ve made an art…

Another month come and gone: April 2011 in photos

It seems like just a couple of days ago we were making out the rent check for April, and next thing we know, it’s already time to pay rent again and we hardly remember anything we did in the last thirty days, mostly because we were drunk the whole time…

A shockingly horrible object appears above Coors Field

It was hard to spot at first, right before the Rockies game near Coors field at about 12:30 p.m. yesterday, but if you took a closer look, there it was: a horrible, horrible object in the skyward vicinity of downtown. As throngs of fans filed into the stadium near the…

Comment of the day: “A campy (and not vomit-inducing) delight”

Ben Affleck has it all: Good looks, rugged charm, acting chops, uh… good looks. Of course, he’s starred in some truly awful movies, but that’s only because those movies weren’t taking advantage of his true talent: directing. Because Ben Affleck is also an awesome director. That’s what Tim Davids argued,…

Eighth annual all-ages Tellerpalooza bash promises to not suck

Now in its eighth year, Teller Elementary School’s Tellerpalooza is an annual evening of music, dancing and all-ages fun tomorrow at the Mercury Cafe (2199 California Street). While the annual fundraiser is very much family-friendly, the event has attracted a diverse array of local artists and musicians — boasting past…

Shameless self-promotion: Jef Otte makes it on the local news

Just in case you doubted that Westword was the foremost authority on dumb shit that happens in the media, know this: We’re such an authority even other media outlets seek our expertise. And when I say “our expertise,” I mean “my expertise.” Yesterday, in advance of the Violent Torpedo of…

Hedwig’s inch gets angry tonight at the Avenue Theater

You may have heard Plato’s theory about the origin of love — the round creatures, male-male, female-female, androgynous, who originally populated the world and were riven in half by an angry Zeus, doomed to spend the rest of eternity searching helplessly for their mates and their own lost souls. But…