No, no…Jason, you gotta listen. This place, it’s going to be great! We’ve got a chef coming in from Suriname. I don’t even know where that is, and the guy doesn’t speak a word of English, but he makes this yak-butter soup you won’t believe!” I get calls like that…
Wow: I knew burgers were important, but I never knew quite how important until I opened the can of worms that is the Tommy’s/In-N-Out/Fatburger debate in the January 1 Bite Me. Since then, the Bite Me HQ mailroom has been flooded with letters, e-mails, screeds and missives on a variety…
For centuries, being banished to snowy Siberia was a fate worse than death for citizens of Russia. If you’d like to experience some authentic, icy Russian culture, without the forced labor, stop by Red Square Euro Bistro in Writer Square. On a blustery January evening, our thickly accented bartender poured…
I am on a roll in this new year, and I’m pretty sure I may be a candidate for sainthood. While I know that bleary-eyed readers are already well-acquainted with my piety, I’ve recently performed the requisite three miracles that should get me an all-expenses-paid trip to Rome and the…
No doubt about it: I have the best job in the world. Make that one of the best jobs in the world, because there are other good careers out there, and I don’t want to step on any toes. International playboy, for a start. Professional coffee taster. Sole heir to…
As an American, your odds of dying from Creutzfeldt-Jakob disease — a variation of bovine spongiform encephalopathy, or mad-cow — are roughly one in a million. Odds of dying in a car accident? One in 242, according to the National Safety Council. Odds of dying by falling “out of or…
In unofficial (and perhaps unintentional) homage to Chicago’s entertainment ringmaster Billy Flynn, the spirited Dazzle Restaurant and Lounge performs lots of alcoholic hocus-pocus with its Razzle Dazzle martini. The delicious, bright yellow Razzle Dazzle ($7) is made by combining Bacardi Raspberry with orange juice and champagne, then served up in…
I wasn’t able to go home to Minnesota over the holidays, but I did manage to find an enclave of natives at Cadillac Jack’s (2250 South Monaco Parkway), where my world ended a few weekends ago. Perhaps you remember this particular Sunday: The Vikings lost to the Arizona state high…
He’s just a kid, maybe ten years old, with very new white sneakers that don’t quite reach the floor and martinet parents like something out of Dickens or the grayer volumes of Hemingway and Fitzgerald. Society types with ramrod postures and delicate, picky little hands. They’re older, but definitely not…
Had Charlie Huang opened Little Ollie’s Asian Cafe, his all-American noodle shack, among the nail salons and after-market car shops along South Federal Boulevard, deep in one of the area’s several versions of Chinatown (or Koreatown, or Vietnamtown, or whatever), he would have been laughed off the block. That’s the…
Even the most devoted cook appreciates time away from his passions. I learned this years ago, when my father bought my mother her first microwave oven. I can still see Mom bawling as she unwrapped her gift. “Mrs. Widmer got diamonds for Christmas,” she sobbed, “and I get something to…
I have multiple vices, and the latest addition to my addictions is Indian food. When I need a fix, I head straight to Little India’s enclosed patio on Sixth Avenue. And since I rarely eat a meal without a cocktail accompaniment — what’s the point? — I promptly settled on…
Max Burgerworks should have been a great restaurant. Like a privileged kid saddled with a goofy name (and not even a truly awful one like Hubertus, Melvin or Agamemnon, but one only slightly unfortunate) or a Montessori rugrat born with every advantage, it had the potential for doing wonderful things,…
All energy flows according to the whims of the Great Magnet. What a fool I was to defy Him.” Hunter Thompson said that, and while the good doctor has said a great many things in his time — a large portion of which have only the most glancing association with…
For most of us drinkers, January 1 isn’t a particularly pretty day. When I’m hung over, I want a Coke, greasy bar food and a Bloody Mary — in that order, please. And that kind of misery loves company, so on the first day of 2004, you might want to…
If I had an unlimited budget, enough pull to get the best guys in town away from their kitchens (or their families) for one night, and room enough at home for all of you good readers, I’d treat you to one great holiday meal. A classy cocktail soiree, dimly lit…
Hey, big guy, I know it’s been a long time since I’ve written, and for that, I apologize. You were pretty good to me back in the day — easy on the coal, no matter how bad a boy I’d been. You overlooked that unfortunate incident with the lawnmower and…
If you’re still wondering how to down your bubbles this New Year’s Eve, let me suggest the Champagne Mojito ($6) at Agave Underground, a concoction powerful enough to blast you into one hell of a 2004. Agave, which opened last month, makes this drink by combining Brut Champagne and Bacardi…
Merry Christmas. Only 24 hours left until some of you (all women) can run out to catch all those post-holiday steals. You’ll say you’re going so that you can get your shopping done early, but you’ll still be back at the malls come Halloween, checking out all the new fads…
I walk into the Cherry Creek Grill, and it just feels right. From the outside, from the inside, from the heavy front doors to the exhibition line in the back, everything about this restaurant oozes comfort. The smell of smoke from the wood-fired rotisserie oven catches me in the chest,…
Chili Cheese Fries Onion Rings Praise Jesus with thanksgiving Isaiah 12:2 That’s what the sign hanging on the door of the A&W in Frisco said last month. Today, it’s “Happy Birthday Jesus” and “Jesus is the reason for this season, Isaiah 7:14,” along with more exhortations for the faithful to…
Following Toby Tyler’s lead, Santa Claus is running away and joining the circus that will be at Mario’s Double Daughter’s Salotto this weekend. Named for Italian ringmaster Mario Guccio’s ax-juggling conjoined-twin daughters who died in 2001, Mario’s Double Daughter is truly one of the greatest shows in town. And in…
