Spring Forward

I probably should have taken a year off between high school and college. Though I was eighteen years of age, fit as a fiddle made entirely of awesome abs, and smart enough to predict the outcome of Goosebumps adventures long before reading their conclusions, I still was not ready for…

Letters to the Editor

“Panhandle With Care,” Adam Cayton-Holland, March 1 Too Hot to Panhandle Having read “Panhandle With Care,” I can rest my inner curmudgeon and say: Hot damn, that was funny. Now, I’m not just saying this because I think I saw my car in the Speer Boulevard picture; I honestly found…

Skin Deep

Is it true that bronzed have more fun? Colorado Senate Bill 23, a bill intended to prohibit the use of a tanning bed by a minor unless specifically prescribed by a physician — thus depriving the rest of us of supple, bronzed teens — advanced yesterday on a 6-3 vote…

Cock-Blocked

Francisco Javier Reyes-Garcia Accused cockfighter Francisco Javier Reyes-Garcia is stepping into a whole new fighting arena. Reyes-Garcia was arrested in Denver last year when authorities found roosters doctored in the custom of fighting cocks — with Mexican razorblades — in his backyard. Fighters fasten the blades to their birds to…

D Note

The lineup was always heavy on jam bands and, eventually, Adam, Jeremy and Matt realized one of their fundamental problems: the fans of that trippy, spacy, Grateful Dead style music were all showing up stoned and stoned hippies don’t drink. Or at least not enough. What stoned hippies do have…

Sew Forth

If you’ve been slacking, then it’s time to get your hands sewing and styling because March 7 is the deadline to enter Tamarac Square’s Fashion Project. The four-week Project Runway-style competion will feature a dozen or so designers each trying to win tickets to fall Fashion Week in New York,…

To Err is Predictable

Just because no correction is published in regard to a newspaper item doesn’t mean it’s necessarily accurate. Take the smaller of two photos that ran in the print edition of the March 5 Denver Post alongside a piece about state funding for veterans; the ink-on-paper report was headlined “Please ‘Help…

Perkiness Overload

The February ratings period is over, and if Channel 9’s seemingly perpetual lead shrank a bit in several time periods, the margin between its broadcasts and those aired by competitors remains hefty. For instance, a Channel 4 press release boasts that ratings of its 6 a.m. newscast grew 71 percent…

An Offer Don Couldn’t Refuse

Yesterday, Vincent Margera, known to fans of MTV’s Viva La Bam as “Don Vito,” entered a not-guilty plea in Jefferson County court regarding charges of inappropriately touching three teenage girls at Colorado Mills mall last summer; his trial is scheduled to begin on August 27. Westword’s original report about Vito’s…

Rock Out

Senator Bob Hagedorn of Aurora is considering introducing a bill that would replace the current state song — the weenie-ass glee club chorus Where the Columbines Grow — with John Denver’s Rocky Mountain High. The catchy anthem seems like an obvious choice. Maybe a little too obvious. Might I suggest…

Devil on the Dance Floor

Denver Police Department Offense Report No: 07-5003857 Date: 3-02-07 Type of Offense: Theft Location of Offense: Armida’s, 840 Lincoln Street Loss: $300 25-year-old victim reports: “I was at Armida’s for Karaoke night. My purse was on the table with my wallet and cash inside it. Some guy tried flirting with…

Return to The Real World

Tyrie is the best The Real World has to offer. It’s been a while since I last picked apart the travesty that is The Real World: Denver. And although it can be argued — and rightfully so — that I’ve been shirking my responsibilities, I’m blaming MTV. I mean, come…

Outta Here, With a Bullet

If there were video footage of myself dancing with the young Guatemalteca in that sweaty, dingy club in Coban, Guatemala, it would look something like this: Adam approaches said young Maya, asks her to dance; young Maya reluctantly agrees. Adam swills heavily from beer one final time for a little…

Chemical Reaction

The double bill of Rise Against and My Chemical Romance, which drew a capacity crowd to DU’s Magness Arena last night, was a study in contrasts. Rise Against is all about seriousness and sincerity and really meaning it, man, while My Chemical Romance celebrates the art of artifice. And on…

Safety First

Evil comes in many forms, and often isn’t identified until it’s infiltrated a community. But if a community is prepared for evil’s unpredictable appearances, good can often triumph — or at least stop evil dead in its tracks, making recovery easier. Bryan Krause knows all about evil. He’s the principal…

Fruition Comes to Fruition

Fruition, which opened last month in the former Somethin’ Else space on Sixth Avenue, opted out of Denver Restaurant Week because owners Paul Attardi and Alex Seidel wisely decided that the crushing DRW scrum might be tough on such a new place. Still, it’s doing a respectable business this week…

Denver Restaurant Week, Day Five

A special report by Amy Haimerl Ugly Americans. That’s the only way to describe the party that was celebrating a fiftieth birthday at Bistro Vendome last night. Of course, if we’d really been sitting on the patio of a Parisian bistro, we’d be saying “Ugly Americans” with an accent and…

Panhandle With Care

On a brisk Tuesday evening in February, concerned citizens, town council members and a cadre of T-shirt-clad firefighters gather at the town hall in Castle Rock — the largest enclave in a county with the second-highest median household income in the nation, a county in which less than 2.1 percent…

Life Swap

Former Denver Post reporter Amy Herdy knows full well that many newspaper types look down upon their broadcast counterparts. After serving in behind-the-scenes capacities at a couple of Florida TV stations during the ’90s, she joined the writing staff of the St. Petersburg Times, and she estimates that it took…

Letters to the Editor

“Holy Shat!” Tuyet Nguyen, February 22 Shat Happens Jeez, I was positively inspired by Tuyet Nguyen’s article on the band Shat and their tune “I Threw Up on Her Cunt.” I mean, I’ve been playing guitar for many moons now, have six CDs out, was just featured in Guitar Player…

Artopia Video

If you missed Lynne Bruning’s fashion show at Artopia, fear not. We have video! Yes, video shot by Vija Rogozina and featuring the extravaganza of black light, pasties, hot pants and fur coats. Meow!…

An “Inconvenient” Connection

During the run-up to the Grammy awards, local media types went on and on about various nominees with links to Colorado — not just performers who still live in these parts, like members of the Fray, but also those reared here, such as India.Arie. But when it came to coverage…