Scream Tour IV

Rumor has it that the young lookers on this bill are planning to sing and rap as part of Scream Tour IV, not just stand around and display their visual gifts to the admiring multitudes. But as the bare-shouldered, pecs-displaying photos being used to promote the show imply, the performers’ appearance is every bit as important as their sound, and probably more so. With that in mind, here’s a helpful guide to the relative hotness of the participants. B5: Two out of five members are smokin’, the remainder merely average. Pretty Ricky: a fine fashion sense, but some hair-styling issues knock them down a notch. Bobby Valentino: simply gorgeous — a classic hunk o’ burning love. Marques Houston: suave, smooth, and he’s got that partially shaved eyebrow thing going for him. Omarion: a little bit of street, a whole lot of sexy. Bow Wow: the no-longer Lil Bow Wow is obviously growing up quite nicely. All in all, it’s a fulsome display of boy-to-man flesh capable of making a dude temporarily forget that he’s straight. Which I am, by the way. Really. I swear.