Christina Nathan Has Satisfaction of Kneeing Cop in Groin, But It Doesn’t Last

Who among us hasn’t fantasized about kneeing a cop in the groin?

Well, a lot of people, probably. Make that hopefully.

But for those who have wondered would it would be like to drive your patella straight into the man zone of a boy in blue, the story of Christina Nathan, Schmuck of the Week honoree, should serve as a cautionary tale.

Because whatever brief satisfaction may have resulted from such a nad attack was quickly replaced by infinitely more negative repercussions.

The release from the Larimer County Sheriff’s Office certainly exudes an air of exasperation.

On June 22, the LCSO notes, Nathan, thirty, was brought to Larimer Conty jail by a Fort Collins police officer on what’s known in the law-enforcement trade as a “detoxication hold.”

In other words, she was headed for an extended stay in the drunk tank.

As Nathan was being escorted from the police vehicle to what’s described as the pat-down area, she allegedly “became combative and struck a corrections deputy in the groin with her knee.”

The officer in question wasn’t seriously injured, but he’s said to have required “medical evaluation.”

We’re guessing the latter went something like this: “Christ, I’ll bet that hurts like hell.”

Nathan went through the booking process without further incident, and had she not given the officer an unwanted opportunity to hit the high notes, she would have been released a few hours later without being criminally charged.

Instead, she was booked on suspected second-degree assault, a felony, and fitted with a bond of $2,500.

Remember that the next time you consider whether to knee a cop in the groin.

Here’s Nathan’s booking photo.