Westword
Audio By Carbonatix
Dear Stoner: I’m trying to sell my home in Aurora, and I’ve unintentionally left my bong or stash out a few times. I can tell the realtor is annoyed, and I get it, but is that really going to stop someone from buying my place?
On the Market
Dear On the Market: As far as realtor requests, this is very tame. Why make anything harder on yourself in this market? It’s hard enough to sell a home in the Denver area for asking price as it is, let alone in Aurora. You shouldn’t just keep a clean house before each showing. You should bake a fresh batch of cookies before each potential buyer arrives, and try every other subliminal trick out there.

Flickr/Buzzed Buds
As someone who pops a chub after smelling dank weed in public, I’d be very turned off by a dirty bong and weed jars during a home tour, too. What other surprises do you have awaiting buyers in your cabinets? How backed up is your garbage disposal?
We’re thankful for you. Are you thankful for us?
We feel thankful for our staff and for the privilege of fulfilling our mission to be an unparalleled source of information and insight in Denver. We’re aiming to raise $50,000 by December 31, so we can continue covering what matters most to this community.
Help us continue giving back to Denver.
Buying a new house is a huge decision, and people will walk away over the smallest things. Hide your stash on a daily basis and act like an adult, Peter Pan.
Herbert Fuego is the alias of a longtime Westword staffer. Send him questions through marijuana@westword.com