But then, the DPD is like our dads, always pointing out the obvious, and we, the citizens of Denver, are like obstinate children, always doing stupid stuff on purpose.

And that's why dad, uh, the DPD has pointed out this chilly morning that hundreds of cars are stolen every winter - keys already in the ignition -- by thieves who look for telltale puffs of exhaust rising from tailpipes.

Not only is it stupid to leave your car unattended while its warning up, in fact, it's also illegal. The city's "puffer" ordinance includes any car that is left running and attended, even those that are locked.

Now, stop making ugly expressions or your face will stay that way.