At today's Denver City Council meeting, as we've reported, an ordinance establishing possible fines and even jail time for home pot smoking that can be seen or smelled from a neighboring property is expected to be presented.
Marijuana activists have already decried the "sniff test" proposal, calling it unconstitutional. But it got us to thinking: What other places in Colorado smell so criminally bad? Here's our top five.
Number 5: Any LoDo alley on Saturday morning
On Friday nights, people letting off steam after a long week flock to LoDo to fill up on substances that eventually need to come out again -- and a lot of folks don't wait to get home before emptying themselves in a wide variety of aromatic ways.
The result is often piles of puke, pools of piss and other stuff we'd rather not describe in detail -- and heating them up the next day doesn't usually improve their scent.
Continue to keep counting down our list of five Colorado places that smell worse than the post smoker next door. Number 4: Stranahan's
Beverage connoisseurs who tour Stranahan's HQ, at 200 South Kalamath, often rhapsodize about the wonderful smell of whiskey. But the combination of ingredients, and the process used to transform them into a wonderfully potent potable, is definitely capable of raising a stink.
Walk along the block, especially on a hot day, and you're likely to spend more time wincing then salivating.
Continue to keep counting down our list of five Colorado places that smell worse than the post smoker next door. Number 3: The RiNo Pig Ear Factory
Neighbors of the Kasel Associates Industry factory, at 33rd and Walnut, have long complained about the smells coming out of the facility -- so much so that Melanie Asmar wrote an entire feature article about the place last year entitled "RiNo neighbors are raising a stink about factory smells in their 'hood." Some sample complaints:
August 13, 2002: Caller reports "bad odor in the air. Smells like dead animals or rotten meat."
April 18, 2005: "Caller left message regarding terrible odor. Said he was 'throwing up.'"
May 24, 2010: Caller reports an "odor that smells like a dead rodent. A lot of dead rodents."
June 14, 2011: "Yet again, I report...nauseating odors in my community," a neighbor wrote in an e-mail. "For years, residents have complained to no avail. The RiNo community feels defeated."
Continue to keep counting down our list of five Colorado places that smell worse than the post smoker next door. Number 2: The Purina Dog Chow Plant
This iconic factory doesn't just stink up its own property. The smell of dog food permeates the entire neighborhood pretty much all the time, with the odor so strong that people on I-70 with the windows down can often get a strong whiff just by driving past.
Granted, we have it on good authority that pooches in the vicinity think the smell is absolutely incredible. If only it did leave them feeling hungry all the time....
Continue to keep counting down our list of five Colorado places that smell worse than the post smoker next door. Number 1: Greeley
Our neighbors to the north are a meatpacking hub for much of the country -- and the resulting stench is capable of making national news. This past August, NPR reported about the community's efforts to change its reputation via new branding and the slogan "Greeley Unexpected," not to mention stink reduction.
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SHOW ME HOW
"The city has taken steps to mitigate the smell, including the creation of an Odor Hotline, which residents can call to report and describe the stench," NPR noted. "Reports have declined significantly since the hotline started in 1995; there were 600 calls the year it started and just 25 in 2012. Also, the meatpacking plant now has a smokestack that further reduces the problem."
Nice effort, Greeley -- but our nostrils tell us you still have a long way to go.
More from our Marijuana archive circa November 2011: "Medical marijuana: Denver's five dankest street corners."