Reader: Cory Gardner Should Become a Supercuts Spokesmodel!

Cory Gardner is out of a job.
Cory Gardner is out of a job.
Keep Westword Free
I Support
  • Local
  • Community
  • Journalism
  • logo

Support the independent voice of Denver and help keep the future of Westword free.

While the presidential election is still not decided, Cory Gardner learned his short-term fate shortly after the polls closed in Colorado on November 3: He will not be going back to the U.S. Senate. Former governor, mayor, brewpub owner and geologist John Hickenlooper easily won that contest.

That means the well-groomed man from Yuma will need a new job. While Hickenlooper, with his very varied career, could certainly offer some advice, Teague Bohlen offered his own ideas in "Ten Potential Jobs for Outgoing Senator Cory Gardner."

And on Westword's Facebook page, readers offered plenty of suggestions of their own. Says Derek:

Supercuts spokesmodel.

Offers Robert:

Trump's POOL BOY!!! Yaasss.

Asks Kyle:

How about a doormat?

Suggests John:

I’m sure that somebody has a barn somewhere where he can shovel shit; that’s what he seems to be good at.

Adds Aubrey:

Used car salesmen since he knows how to lie and bullshit people.

Comments Andrew:

Professional hide-and-seek player would be my suggestion.

Replies Vi:

He will go back to doing nothing, except he will not get paid for it now.

Notes Sam:

He’ll be a lobbyist by tomorrow

But then there's this from Scott:


And Rob concludes:

Perhaps he can get a job writing for Westword, so they could have some intelligent, thoughtful, and informed writing instead of the drivel of this article.

What did you think of the job that Cory Gardner did as a senator? What do you think he should do next? Post a comment or share your thoughts at editorial@westword.com.

Keep Westword Free... Since we started Westword, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of Denver, and we would like to keep it that way. Offering our readers free access to incisive coverage of local news, food and culture. Producing stories on everything from political scandals to the hottest new bands, with gutsy reporting, stylish writing, and staffers who've won everything from the Society of Professional Journalists' Sigma Delta Chi feature-writing award to the Casey Medal for Meritorious Journalism. But with local journalism's existence under siege and advertising revenue setbacks having a larger impact, it is important now more than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" membership program, allowing us to keep covering Denver with no paywalls.

We use cookies to collect and analyze information on site performance and usage, and to enhance and customize content and advertisements. By clicking 'X' or continuing to use the site, you agree to allow cookies to be placed. To find out more, visit our cookies policy and our privacy policy.


Join the Westword community and help support independent local journalism in Denver.


Join the Westword community and help support independent local journalism in Denver.