Education

Ten CMU Confessions About Deep-Throating a Prof and More

This month, colleges across Colorado have wrapped up classes for the 2015-2016 school year, including Colorado Mesa University, one of my many alma maters (don't ask).

And judging by the posts recently shared on the Colorado Mesa University Confessions Facebook page, the experience has been an up-and-down affair.

Especially for one student whose oral exams with a professor didn't quite pay off.

That's just one of the ten memorable confessions shared below, illustrated by graphics from the page.


Count them down below.


Number 10:

"I hate it when teachers require doctor's notes for excused absences. Like bitch I am a 22 year old college senior, getting ready to graduate, and we both know the only thing I can afford in the doctor category is 'Dr.' Dimitri with his panel van and rusty equipment. "


Number 9:

I confess that for every 1 post i see on this page about school, i see 10 about sex. This does not reflect well on the intellect of the student body nor does it make me want to pay a ton of money to return to this institution. You know you could suck dick for free back home right instead of wasting daddy's money to suck rich boy dick.

Number 8:

My grades this semester haven't been stellar. I have one professor who grades so harshly and I am so burnt out. I have never done so poorly on exams in four years of college. I don't understand the problem other than that I work a lot and I have gone through so many changes this past year with moving twice and starting a new job, and my mom being recently diagnosed with colon cancer. My best friends have not even texted me in the past week and a half to see how I am holding up, even though they post on facebook. I always feel like I am the only one who knows how to be a good friend. The struggle is real.

Number 7:

"I was already having a shitty day when I saw this on my legally-parked car. Glad I'm the inconsiderate, egotistical one."

Number 6:

I'm about to graduate from the aviation program $75,000 in debt... Luckily no one is hiring pilots. Oh well, good thing I make money on iPhone apps.

Continue to see five more memorable Colorado Mesa University confessions.

KEEP WESTWORD FREE... Since we started Westword, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of Denver, and we'd like to keep it that way. With local media under siege, it's more important than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" program, allowing us to keep offering readers access to our incisive coverage of local news, food and culture with no paywalls.
Michael Roberts has written for Westword since October 1990, serving stints as music editor and media columnist. He currently covers everything from breaking news and politics to sports and stories that defy categorization.
Contact: Michael Roberts