Ten CMU Confessions About Deep-Throating a Prof and More

This month, colleges across Colorado have wrapped up classes for the 2015-2016 school year, including Colorado Mesa University, one of my many alma maters (don't ask).

And judging by the posts recently shared on the Colorado Mesa University Confessions Facebook page, the experience has been an up-and-down affair.

Especially for one student whose oral exams with a professor didn't quite pay off.

That's just one of the ten memorable confessions shared below, illustrated by graphics from the page.

Count them down below.


Number 10:

"I hate it when teachers require doctor's notes for excused absences. Like bitch I am a 22 year old college senior, getting ready to graduate, and we both know the only thing I can afford in the doctor category is 'Dr.' Dimitri with his panel van and rusty equipment. "

Number 9:

I confess that for every 1 post i see on this page about school, i see 10 about sex. This does not reflect well on the intellect of the student body nor does it make me want to pay a ton of money to return to this institution. You know you could suck dick for free back home right instead of wasting daddy's money to suck rich boy dick.

Number 8:

My grades this semester haven't been stellar. I have one professor who grades so harshly and I am so burnt out. I have never done so poorly on exams in four years of college. I don't understand the problem other than that I work a lot and I have gone through so many changes this past year with moving twice and starting a new job, and my mom being recently diagnosed with colon cancer. My best friends have not even texted me in the past week and a half to see how I am holding up, even though they post on facebook. I always feel like I am the only one who knows how to be a good friend. The struggle is real.

Number 7:

"I was already having a shitty day when I saw this on my legally-parked car. Glad I'm the inconsiderate, egotistical one."

Number 6:

I'm about to graduate from the aviation program $75,000 in debt... Luckily no one is hiring pilots. Oh well, good thing I make money on iPhone apps.

Continue to see five more memorable Colorado Mesa University confessions.

Number 5:

I developed feelings for some one I work with and almost lost a five year relationship. He made me look at the world differently and challenged me to be a better person. I wish the person I have been with all this time could do that for me.

Number 4:

"I don't like that I am given shit for liking larger girls. If I think some one is beautiful, then she is, in my eyes. I don't need some ""dude-bro"" calling me a chubby chaser or some shit. It not only degrades the women, but it also makes me feel bad because they make it sound like a bad thing and that I am a social outcast for being the way I am. But I'm still going to find beautiful whomever I find beautiful now."

Number 3:

"I am that evil person who won't give you my notes because you were too lazy to get to class."

Number 2:

Someday I'm going to have a daughter and I'm going to name her Thurma. Life will be difficult for Thurma because of her name, but she'll grow up to be an hedge fund manager on Wall Street and drive a Porsche Cayenne.

Number 1:

I've been deep throating him all semester with the perception I'd be getting an A. HOW DARE YOU TELL ME BEFORE THE FINAL I'M FAILING THE CLASS.