Bambi Ballgag Has Their Finger on The Pulse of Sapphic Nightlife

Bambi Ballgag’s drag aesthetic is evident in their name: part adorable, and part freak. “I used to do a lot more cutesy, Harajuku-style looks, which I still like to do sometimes, but I feel like now I either am doing very comedic stuff, or very ’90s, Pamela Anderson-inspired sexpot, hair metal, fetish kind of looks,” says the Denver-based drag queen, who identifies as a nonbinary lesbian.

As the founder, producer, and host of Fingerbang, a monthly sapphic drag show every third Friday of the month at The Pearl, Ballgag has created a one-of-a-kind event designed by sapphics, for sapphics. They define sapphic as, “A really beautiful umbrella term for people who are not cis men, that are also involved with people who are not cis men, and that deviate from the sexual majority of straightness in some way.”

It’s a more inclusive designation that unites lesbians, bisexuals, and gender-expansive individuals. “My preferred thing that I like to be called is a dyke, but that’s kind of harsh for some people. There’s more of an intense political backing. I feel like people are intimidated by the discourse over the title ‘lesbian,’ which has been a thing for eons,” they clarify. “So I think sapphic is a good entryway. It just gives people that flexibility.”

Ballgag’s identity as a proud dyke influences everything about their drag, from their music choices and looks to the cultural references they incorporate into their performances. “It’s such a different way of seeing culture. I usually do at least one duet during Fingerbang, and that’s pretty much always a lesbian duet,” they say. Past duets, often with Denver queen Sexy Sadie, have been inspired by lesbian canon favorites like Jennifer’s Body, Steven Universe, and “All The Things She Said” by t.A.T.u. “The references, not that anyone can’t love those things, but I try to cater towards the dyke gaze, especially in terms of what I wear,” confirms Ballgag. Catering to “the dyke gaze” comes naturally to them, since it’s an expression of their own desire: “Honestly, it makes me selfish, because I just want to be a beautiful woman and be horny for myself.”

But the intention behind Ballgag’s drag is not just about looking hot. It’s a reaction to the country’s increasingly conservative political and cultural landscape, and a reminder that sapphic identity is expansive. “For my drag and events, I want them to be oversexed. Right now, with this administration, we’re getting back into Western puritan, Judeo-Christian, deeply evil shit. So I just want to sex it up,” they say. “I feel like there’s not enough oversexed lesbians in the public view. Like, at all. The public will think of, as they always have, a butch lesbian. Which is fair, but it’s nice to show that dykeness comes in all flavors. It’s fun to have an oversexed femme persona!”

Gay male culture, especially in the realm of nightlife, usually leans into overt sexuality as a default. Underwear parties, fetish nights, and half (or fully) naked men are commonplace in gay bars and clubs, but sapphic spaces rarely embrace sexuality in the same way.

Says Ballgag, “If you go into somewhere like [Denver gay bar] Trade, there’s like, gay porn on the TV. There’s not that many spaces where that is the case for dykes, so the vibe I want to curate both with my looks and my events is that it’s cool and safe to just be a nasty, horny lesbian. I wanted the posters for Fingerbang to look like an ad in the back of a Playgirl, and I do want to have porn on the walls.”

Thanks to local lesbian bar The Pearl, Ballgag has built an event series where sapphic sexuality is both normalized and truly celebrated. They first collaborated with The Pearl in late 2024, when it was still in its previous location and called Pearl Divers. It was a one-off event with a different name, but that initial event became the precursor to Fingerbang, which officially began as a monthly show in January 2025.

Though Ballgag feels fortunate that they haven’t faced discrimination from their fellow performers based on their gender and sexuality, performing in sapphic spaces is still a new and different experience for them. “I’m really lucky in my drag career that I’ve never felt a lot of hostility from people, including gay men. I know a lot of performers who are not men have issues with that, but I’m lucky that that has not been my experience,” they express. “I’ve always been very welcomed in those spaces, which has been the biggest gift, but I feel like now that I’m booked pretty much 90 percent of the time at The Pearl, it’s so nice to be around family, as corny as that sounds.”

Trial by fire is sort of a rite of passage for drag performers, but the audiences at Fingerbang give plenty of encouragement and support: “As a performer too, it’s a much more welcoming crowd. I think as a drag performer, you should go to a gay bar and bomb in front of a bunch of mean gay men, but it’s also really nice to be around people who are just genuinely happy to see the art, and see themselves in the artists.”

When Ballgag started drag nearly a decade ago, smaller queer venues were still thriving around Denver, giving performers plenty of opportunities to experiment with and develop their drag. “It was such a different environment before COVID, and then everything changed. It was a crazy cultural shift, and the vibe of drag is so different now. There used to be a lot more risk-taking, but there’s unfortunately just not a lot of places to do that now,” they admit.

In the wake of losing several of Denver’s beloved queer spaces, the drag landscape shifted in favor of seasoned “resident” performers who are contracted by a specific bar to host recurring (usually monthly) shows there. “It made everything very fractured, and even more hierarchical in an environment where that’s already pretty prevalent. So that’s a huge bummer. I feel like it’s, for lack of a better word, very cliquey now. People have their bars that they’re booked at, and there’s little to no overlap. There’s nothing that’s really meshing everything together,” they lament.

Fingerbang is Ballgag’s answer to this fragmentation. Their casts are intentionally curated to bring different kinds of performers together, both for the sake of variety and in the interest of fostering relationships between all queer and trans demographics. “For the casts, I’m really careful to do a few alternative girls, because most of the people in the community are going to be more alternative performers, especially in terms of booking dyke performers. I always make sure to book a drag king, because it’s my favorite and they’re sexy. But I always make sure to book more of a dancer too, because I feel like that just brings it all together, to have something from every little pocket of drag,” they explain.

Not all of the performers Ballgag books for Fingerbang identify as sapphic, but it’s rare for them to book cis male drag queens, and many of their casts are all trans: “The people that I mostly book are people under the trans umbrella, mostly trans women. I feel, even if a trans woman doesn’t identify as sapphic, those are our sisters, so of course they’re going to be in the sapphic drag show.”

They elaborate, “They’re a huge part of the drag community, that maybe wouldn’t often intersect because, for example, a trans woman who only dates men isn’t going to go to a lesbian bar, but I really want to cultivate that community. We need to know the history of all they have done for us, which is everything, and give them that platform. As silly as it is to still have discourse about transness in lesbian spaces, that does still exist.”

Continues Ballgag, “They’re also just the best performers you’ll ever see. As alternative as I want to say I am, I will always cry when I see a girl with big beautiful hair and rhinestones doing a spilt. It brings me to tears every time. Give me a Britney Spears mix and I’m good!” Fingerbang keeps audiences on their toes by showcasing a sampling of the many different drag styles that exist, even within the realm of sapphic drag: “It makes the show smoother, and all of the acts are given their flowers in different ways. No one knows what’s going to come next. Is it going to be a goth baddie pouring blood on themselves, or is it going to be a beautiful showgirl covered in peacock feathers? You have to have it all.”

It’s not just the performers that make Fingerbang Denver’s premiere sapphic drag show. It’s a combination of the people, the venue, the vibe, the performances, and of course, girl-on-girl action. “In terms of what makes it a sapphic drag show, yes the performers are many times under the sapphic umbrella. A lot of the performances, like the duets we do, are very gay. There’s a lot of girl-on-girl making out,” Ballgag says. As the event’s producer and host, it’s up to them to set the tone, like by trading all the dick jokes normally found throughout a drag show for sapphic-coded sex jokes instead: “It sounds big-headed, but I think having a host and an emcee who is a dyke is the biggest thing. Like, you go to [Denver gay bar] Hamburger Mary’s, and everyone is talking about sucking dick and cock. So just to have someone on the mic saying some stupid joke about lesbian sex, it opens people up to being like, ‘Ok, this is entertainment that is for me, and I should be here.’ As much as I love drag shows [at other bars], you know when something isn’t for your gaze, even if you can still enjoy it.”

By partnering with The Pearl, Ballgag has filled a demand for a sex-positive sapphic space that centers queer women and nonbinary individuals. “The Pearl makes this really beautiful place for lesbians to show off sexuality,” they emphasize. “We do kink tastings too. I always bring my big St. Andrew’s cross, and have a pro dominatrix doing floggings and impact stuff. This month or next, we’re going to have someone doing shibari, and we’re starting up a hanky code table.”

Ballgag aims to empower attendees to explore their sexuality in a safe and supportive community of their peers. “I want the event to be for people who want to dip their toes into a more alternative, kinky lifestyle, but don’t really know how to go about it. There’s kink night at [Denver gay club] Tracks, which I love and adore, but it can be kind of intimidating. Then, of course, there are actual dungeons, but people don’t really know how to get into those. So it’s like a little peek into that lifestyle,” explains Ballgag. “It’s been so cute to see these little lesbians get spanked or get off the cross and be like, ‘Oh my gosh, that was the first time I’ve ever done that!’ I’m so proud.”

Despite the racy offerings and eroticism of Fingerbang, there’s a wholesomeness to the event as well. “It is a horny, sexy, environment, but people are very kind and sweet. There’s an air of gentleness, because everyone is very free, and loving, and accepting. People tell me it’s an easy crowd to go and talk to someone, or make a friend, and that’s been really lovely to hear,” says Ballgag. “Ultimately, I wanted to make an event that I would have fun at, so if my friends and I have fun, and it’s pulling in cool dykes and cool trans people, that’s genuinely all I care about. I have never been around this many sapphics and dykes and lesbians in my whole life. It’s been really nice to see the community come out and embrace the show and have fun. That’s been the biggest honor.”

Fingerbang takes place every third Friday of the month. The next Fingerbang is Friday, March 20, at The Pearl with performances from host Bambi Ballgag, LeeLee, King Vaughnz, Slyce StaxXx, and Piérre Contraire. Doors open at 8:30 p.m. for the 9:30 p.m. show. Altered Angel and Domme Sprout will offer impact play and shibari tastings, and Babalon Killz will be running Fingerbang’s first hanky code booth. Gummy Kaiju, Captain Spooky, and Destruya will be present as vendors, with DJ Libuse spinning a techno set after the show. The cover is $10 and must be paid at the door.