Dateless in Denver: The Circle Jerk

A real disaster: the 1933 flood when the Castlewood dam burst. Denver Public Library

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At the start of the summer, in anticipation of all those hot times ahead, we shared a string of articles about dating in Denver, including a cover piece that explored "Why Dating in Denver Is a Dumpster Fire."

Then, because misery loves company, we introduced "Dateless in Denver," a series of reader essays on the realities of dating in Denver — the good, the bad and the ugly — that most recently shared an account of how dating is no walk in the park. Now we have another hiking saga, from Robin:

So, I went on a hiking date with this guy to Castlewood Canyon — his pick. He strolled up in jorts. We started on our short hike to the dam along the creek, and I could hear him quietly groaning and grunting. When I asked if he wanted to go back to our cars or continue to the dam, he insisted on continuing. When we got to the dam, I excitedly shared the story of when it was created and broke. This guy, however, seemed completely uninterested and annoyed.

So, I suggested we head back to the cars. His response: "WHAT? WE HAVE TO HIKE BACK? WE HAVEN'T BEEN HIKING IN A LOOP?" I was so confused; we had been hiking south along a creek. What creek goes in a circle??? I politely explained that no, this was not a loop, and we would need to hike back the way we came.

When we made it back to the parking lot, he confessed that it was actually his first hike ever, despite being a Colorado native in his forties. The jorts should have tipped me off.

click to enlarge

Kim Salas

Have a dating story — good or bad — that you'd like to share? An essay on the scene in general? We'll be running another installment of "Dateless in Denver" next weekend. Send your submission to [email protected], where you can also comment on previous posts.