Herz Tries Harder

After visiting Carmine’s on Penn (see review), I decided to check in with Carmine’s original owner, Larry Herz. I hadn’t talked to him since he announced he was closing his Go Fish Grille, at 250 Josephine Street (which had replaced his Indigo at the same address), and going to work…

Margarita de la Casa

One recent blustery night, suffering from my second cold of the season but feeling like I was coughing up bird feathers and had become the first North American victim of the bird-flu pandemic, I grabbed a few friends to test out this new proverb: “Drink a cold, feed a fever.”…

Backcountry Brewery

My New Year’s resolution is to be like U.S. Representative Tom Tancredo, only a little more conservative. I decided this after spending part of the holidays in Summit County with several million people from out-of-state who I doubt had ever sat in chairs, much less been schooled in skiing etiquette…

3 Sons

When I wrote my original review of 3 Sons (“Same Old, Same Old,” September 11, 2003), people called me an assassin. They called me a thug and an asshole and a brainless, potty-mouthed jerkoff who didn’t know nothin’ from nothin’. What I didn’t get was a single letter sympathizing with…

Shakin’ Bacon

It’s not often that a fellow like myself — a dedicated carnivore, shameless bacon addict, fan of all things larded, bloody and fat-spackled — goes looking for health food. Ten cups of coffee a day, taken as preventative medicine against potential lifestyle complications like sleep; ice cream for breakfast, Cuban…

Family Plan

The problem wasn’t so much that we were drinking, but that neither of us had really stopped in a couple of days. When my little brother and I get together back home — as annually as we can manage — drinking is just what we do. It’s not to excess…

Spanky’s Roadhouse

I believe Spanky’s Roadhouse (1800 East Evans Avenue) chose its name in hopes of generating buzz before patrons even crossed the threshold. Whenever anyone who was born at least twenty years ago hears the word “roadhouse,” he immediately thinks of the cheesy ’80s movie with Patrick Swayze and then almost…

Testing Boundaries

Okay, so John Holly’s Asian Bistro in Lone Tree isn’t Super Star Asian (the incredible dim sum place at 2200 West Alameda) or the old Mee Yee Lin (another incredible dim sum place that became a merely passable dim sum place with great shu mai and incredible dumpling soup after…

Mama’s House

Mama T is leaving. She’s moving to Cincinnati, where her husband is working a factory job now, where there’s another apartment waiting, another community expecting her. She’s going with her son Rafael, and she’s taking her pots and pans. She’s taking her living-room set with the white lace doilies. She’s…

Pumpkin Pie Martini

Drink of the week? We were looking for the drink of the season, and it wasn’t going down all that well. Twenty-eight restaurants had signed up for the Denver Convention & Visitors Bureau’s first Mile High Libations contest — that added up to 31 drinks, each bearing a Mile-High friendly…

Five in 2005

I consider it one of the great fortunes of my life that, for as long as I have been my own man, I have never had a normal year — one that could be anticipated, seen through end to end, navigated on an even keel. All of my years have…

Finding Nemo

I have not always been a good guy, and I have not always lived a good life. I have committed sins venial, carnal and culinary, have knowingly done wrong and sometimes enjoyed it quite a bit. I have vices, secret shames, public hatreds, a checkered past — and remain, in…

Fish Story

Okay, so it’s not very often that I come down on the same side intellectually and ideologically as the folks from People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals. As a matter of fact, it’s not very often that I can stand to be in the same room with any of…

Charbay Green Tea Vodka Martini

I recently started working out with a personal trainer named Michael. When I complain that the weights are too heavy, Michael tells me that he confused my weights with those of “Mrs. Peterson, who is eighty years old and just entered assisted living.” When I tell him I think I…

Party Time

‘Tis the season when it’s socially acceptable to act like someone who hit puberty and was given the keys to a brand-new muscle car on the same day. The culmination of this season is the office Christmas party, which rivals revealing government secrets as a foolproof way to ruin a…

Happy Meal

Unlike Aquarium — the fish restaurant at the Downtown Aquarium (see review) — Eat Street at the Denver Children’s Museum is not serving any of its less successful exhibits for lunch. Nor did operators Jay and Emily Solomon (who also own the nearby Jay’s Patio Cafe on 15th Street) feel…

Intelligent Design

Planned communities creep me out. It’s something about their zero-down homogeneity, the Stepford-ness of their razor-straight streets and perfectly manicured medians, their covenant controls and faux-utopian doubleplusgood Orwellian weirdness. It’s the way they build their own parks, schools and churches on the same templates that govern the placement of their…

Hey, Santa

I don’t spill a lot of ink writing about chefs and restaurants doing charity events. A lot of you probably think that’s because I’m a miserable, Scrooge-ish crank full of spite and humbuggery. And while I certainly am, the real reason I don’t keep track of every bake-off, giveaway, beneficent…

The Knockout

After those recent, regrettable shootings in LoDo, a friend remarked that the area has been taken over by juvenile delinquents and that there’s nowhere to take older workmates or parents for a cocktail. I was blown away by this comment. LoDo is chockablock with fine establishments for the more sedate…

Cafe Bisque

This is a good week. Why? Because Second Helping is finally getting to do what I’d always hoped it would do: give a second shot to a restaurant savaged in a previous review, a place that’s now worthy of being welcomed into the fold. Although many of the good spots…

The World Is Flat

Up to this point, I had given about as much thought to the foods of Argentina as I had to the high peaks of Cincinnati or the beaches of Kansas. And I had given about as much thought to Argentina in general as I had to Victorian haberdashery or the…

Global Crossing

Buenos Aires,” says Francis Carrera, owner of Buenos Aires Pizzeria (see review), rolling the name of his native city off his tongue like he’s savoring it, as if every letter were spun out of sugar. “It’s all about women and the food, you know? It’s a dangerous place.” Though he…