Dear Readers: Over the past couple of weeks, the Know Nothing nation has invaded my in-box, asking why the United States can’t follow the stringent immigration laws of Mexico. They’re merely parroting a recent column by the reprehensible Michelle Malkin, who thought that bringing up the issue was an original…
Dear Readers: I was supposed to deliver this column to ustedes for Cinco de Drinko, but then Arizona’s reprehensible SB1070 reared its ugly head. I could devote this column to that issue again, but Mexican-hating is a national sport, and we must darle chingazos wherever it pops out. Big shout-outs,…
Dear Readers: All together, now: ¡A LA CHINGADA WITH ARIZONA’S SB1070! For those of ustedes too occupied with your Drinko por Cinco hangover, the initiative I mentioned (signed a couple of weeks ago into law by Arizona’s governor) gives immigration powers to the state’s police officers and sheriff’s deputies and…
Dear Mexican: I live in a Northeastern city, and a game I play with myself during the cold, wintry months is counting how many Mexicans I see without a heavy coat or appropriate outer garment. Believe me, I’m not prejudiced (I, too, am a minority, and this game is lightweight…
Dear Mexican: I have a friend who frequently wears a T-shirt that boldly states in big, bad-ass, Old English letters, “Hecho en México.” Five facts follow: • He was born 23 years ago in the United States, in Bellflower, California • His truly Mexican parents were nowhere near Mexico when…
Dear Mexican: I’ve dated a few Mexican girls in the last couple of years, and I’ve come to realize one big, important thing: Most of the girls didn’t know how to cook, clean and, you know…bring that ol’-school Mexican flavor from the roots! What’s happening to all our true mexicanas?…
Dear Mexican: I know that Mexicans and pochos can be black, white, Asian and indios, but I just got my United States Census form. Figured you would be the best person to ask about question #9-Race. I know I’m not white (I’ve been pulled over too many times for BS…
Dear Mexican: I just read that Speedy Gonzales is getting his own feature film and will be voiced by George Lopez. I read in the Hollywood Reporter that Lopez said he gave Speedy his “Latino Seal of Approval.” Who grants this seal? What does it look like, and how did…
Dear Mexican: By now, I’m sure you’re aware of all the hate crimes against Hispanics in the last few years. By now, I’m sure you’re thinking that this is ¡Ask a Mexican!, not ¡Ask a Hispanic! But let me tell you that all the hate crimes against Hispanics have been…
Dear Mexican: When I was in high school, everyone called the Mexican students like myself “cheddars.” I’m not sure where this originated from, or what it really has to do with Mexican culture. When I have asked other Mexicans what this means, they weren’t sure, either. “Cheddar packing” is a…
Dear Mexican: I’m a pan blanco and my wife is puertorriqueña. Our son looks basically white, while a casual observer might admit that there is some Latin going on there. I’m not sure how this pertains to my question — it may or may not be worth mentioning. Our son…
Dear Mexican: I am a lifelong resident of Arizona and have worked side by side with illegals for 25 years as a bloquero. In all that time, I never knew one of them to be an aspiring American. In fact, their loyalties remain with their home states, they listen to…
Dear Mexican: People talk about the costs of illegal immigration on our society. What about the savings? Has there been any research into how much more a meal at a restaurant would cost without Mexicans cooking and washing dishes? What percentage increase would we see with supermarket produce if migrant…
Dear Mexican: I’ve always been attracted to transgendered women since I was about thirteen. I’ve noticed, however, that most trannies are Hispanic. Now, before you say that this is ¡Ask a Mexican!, not ¡Ask a Hispanic!, I’ve also noticed that more than half of all Hispanic transsexuals are Mexican. What’s…
Dear Mexican: How can a formerly proud Latina like myself feel proud to be Mexican again after my beloved relative was murdered in Mexico by narcos while visiting? I still have love for my heritage, and I understand that many Mexican people live in desperate situations because they have no…
Dear Mexican: Why do so many Mexicans work for Taco Bell and El Pollo Loco? Don’t they know they only add a false credence to the belief that this is Mexican cuisine? The bastardizing of the truly great and diverse food of Mexico by the money-hungry corporations of the U.S.,…
Dear Readers: Siempre, the wisest words that appear in this column come from ustedes, y the following two cartas prove this maxim. The first one addresses my year-end column, in which a working-class gabacho insisted his people apapachan a Mexicans mucho: Dear Mexican: Half-Mexican here. I was fortunate enough to…
Dear Mexican: I’m surprised by the choice of the word “amnesty” by those who would demonize immigration reform, especially in the South. Doesn’t the modern well-being of many Southerners derive in some way from their ancestors’ having sworn to amnesty oaths, both before and after the Civil War? Isn’t it…
Dear Readers: The Mexican is still trying to shake off the Herradura from the previous year, so this week I’m reprinting a favorite from el pasado. To make up for my siesta, though, I’m bringing back the YouTube edition of this column, where I’ll take the questions of the non-anonymous…
Dear Mexican: Why in the hell does everything have to be in English and Spanish? I ride the bus/train to work (not because I must, but because it’s more efficient), and every time someone requests to stop, you hear “Stop Requested,” then this parar bullshit! Not to mention the schools…
Dear Mexican: Can you recommend a solid, accessible history of California and Arizona so I can learn what really happened when the United States gobbled Aztlán? La Chica Confundida Dear Wabette: The holistic classic in this genre is Rodolfo Acuña’s Occupied America: A History of Chicanos, but it’s a bit…
Dear Mexican: I’m an Asian female, and for some time now, I’ve been fascinated by the Mexican culture. I find Mexican males to be very attractive. Their food, language and music are just amazing! How much of a chance do I have dating a Mexican hombre if I’m Asian? Muchacha…
