Ask a Stoner: Confessions of a Lighter Thief

Westword

Audio By Carbonatix

[
          {
            "name": "GPT - Billboard - Slot Inline - Content - Labeled - No Desktop",
            "component": "23668565",
            "insertPoint": "2",
            "requiredCountToDisplay": "2"
          },{
            "name": "STN Player - Float - Mobile Only ",
            "component": "23853568",
            "insertPoint": "2",
            "requiredCountToDisplay": "2"
          },{
            "name": "Editor Picks",
            "component": "17242653",
            "insertPoint": "4",
            "requiredCountToDisplay": "1"
          },{
            "name": "Inline Links",
            "component": "18838239",
            "insertPoint": "8th",
            "startingPoint": 8,
            "requiredCountToDisplay": "7",
            "maxInsertions": 25
          },{
            "name": "GPT - 2x Rectangles Desktop, Tower on Mobile - Labeled",
            "component": "24956856",
            "insertPoint": "8th",
            "startingPoint": 8,
            "requiredCountToDisplay": "7",
            "maxInsertions": 25 
          
          },{
            "name": "Inline Links",
            "component": "18838239",
            "insertPoint": "8th",
            "startingPoint": 12,
            "requiredCountToDisplay": "11",
            "maxInsertions": 25
          },{
            "name": "GPT - Leaderboard to Tower - Slot Auto-select - Labeled",
            "component": "17676724",
            "insertPoint": "8th",
            "startingPoint": 12,
            "requiredCountToDisplay": "11",
            "maxInsertions": 25
          }
        ]

Dear Stoner: I’m an ashamed pocketer of lighters after smoking and have gone home with hundreds, mostly by accident. I don’t know how to stop. Any suggestions?
Bic Thief

Dear Bic Thief: We’ve all been lighter thieves at one point, but don’t act like this is merely some innocent byproduct of smoking weed, or that you suddenly turn into a Bic-hungry wolfman when THC enters your blood. If, after years of getting high with others, you still habitually end up with someone else’s lighter, it’s time to look in the mirror — or at least start patting yourself down more often.

click to enlarge

Flickr/qiaomeng

Every group of friends has at least one lighter thief among them (although those joint circles shouldn't be too big or common during the pandemic), but that's never a desired reputation, especially if you smoke cigarettes. If you really want to stop being that person, start trying to be a thoughtful person after smoking pot, which may require a little less toking on your end. Another option is to give friends the green light to interrogate you when they're looking for their belongings, which I’m sure they’d enjoy. Actually, shame on them for not doing so in the first place.

Send questions to [email protected].