Schmuck of the Week

TV Anchor Brendan Higgins Fakes Passing Out During Drunken Bust But Can't Stop Giggling

TV anchor Brendan Higgins was a popular personality at Dallas' CBS11, helming the morning program with requisite wackiness. But his schtick didn't go over too well during a bust in Aspen earlier this month -- which is why we used the word was in referring to his status at the station. Learn why this self-described "asshole" got bounced from his gig below.

See also: Tyler Konecne and His Identity Were Hidden From Everyone But the Police Dog

Just a few short months ago, Higgins, who came to CBS11 in 2012 after a successful seven-year run at Dallas' NBC affiliate reportedly ended amid a contract dispute, was the centerpiece of a promo in which he was said to specialize in waking up Dallas viewers one person at a time. Here's the clip.

But things changed in a big way after TV writer Ed Bark, known as Uncle Barky, revealed the contents of an Aspen Police Department document about Higgins from earlier in the month.

After midnight on August 6, according to the report, Aspen officers were dispatched to The Little Nell, a well-known hotel in the tony town, after receiving word that "a male guest had punched a driver and was being violent with the staff" -- something that allegedly happened as an ultra-drunk Higgins was being carried from a car to the elevator.

When confronted by the cops, Higgins is said to have admitted being a bad boy -- or at least that's how we'd interpret the line "I was an asshole."

Judging by the police narrative, Higgins's confession didn't result in a major behavior upgrade. As he was being taken into custody, he reportedly called the cops "fucking pieces of shit" and announced, "I'm going to beat you until you're dead." But these reactions were mere preludes to the incident's highlight.

The police report notes:

Higgins then attempted to strike me using a swiping motion with his hands. I pushed Higgins towards the elevator doors, which he was standing a few inches from. Higgins hit the elevator with his head and then pretended to pass out and slumped to the floor. I could tell that Higgins had not actually passed out because he was giggling.
This stunt apparently resulted in the gash across Higgins's nose visible in his booking photo -- and it seems to have done a number on his sense of humor, too. The cops say he kicked at them as they put him in a "hobble restraint," then told paramedics called to check him out that he would "beat them till they die."

Bet they didn't giggle.

The news broke in Dallas on August 15, and four days later, Higgins posted this response on his Facebook page:
If my e-mail inbox is any indication, many of you are wondering about a recent incident in Aspen, Colo., that resulted in my arrest. Sorry it took so long to issue a post as I've been dealing with the related matters. First, I need to apologize for the negative attention this incident has brought to my wife and our family, our friends and the many wonderful people I've worked with over the years. I'm also sorry to the authorities in Aspen, who do a great job every day. I simply put myself and others in a bad situation, which will not happen again. My plan is to answer the legal charges against me. Thanks to all of you who have sent your support.
This mea culpa doesn't seem to have garnered much sympathy from station management. He wasn't on the air Tuesday morning, and a CBS11 rep responding to a subsequent inquiry from replied that Higgins was "no longer with the station."

His dismissal should free him up for an upcoming September 6 court appearance in Aspen on charges of disorderly conduct and resisting arrest. In the meantime, we encourage him to enjoy sleeping in -- and to bask in the honor of being our latest Schmuck of the Week.

Here's the full-size version of Higgins's booking photo.

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