Colorado Driver Hopes to Get Pot-Profiled in Nebraska, But No Luck

Over the past couple of years, we've shared plenty of stories about drivers who feel they've been pot-profiled in other states because their vehicle had Colorado license plates.

Most recently, we shared the story of Gabriel Campbell, who was pulled over in Texas for an extremely minor infraction — after which law-enforcers found five pounds of cannabis in the trunk of his Colorado car.

Plenty of Colorado drivers haven't had this experience, though — including one reader who was actually hoping it would happen and seems disappointed it didn't. Here's his humorous account, shared with us via e-mail.
So I just went on a road trip and thought I would travel the dreaded I-76 to I-80 corridor from Denver to Toledo, Ohio — as much as I would have loved to get pulled over to allow a brow-beating over my thoughts of Nebraska's lawsuit and Colorado plate-profiling reports.

I left on my journey in a vehicle I thought they would hopefully profile: pickup, dark-tint windows, bed cover and looking heavily loaded (actually empty), and me with long beard and mustache, long hair, greasy-looking.

I swerved and drove at erratic speeds — everything that here at home would get me instantly flagged and looked into. BUT not a damn thing. Not a look, not a "Slow down, wake up" or an "I am here behind you watching you" attention-getter. Matter of fact, I was very depressed that short of cutting off a state trooper, I wasn't drawing enough interest.

Don't get me wrong: My wife and I counted no less than 32 troopers racing up and down the highway, lights flashing, siren blaring. But NO: I had CO plates, looked like a suspicious driver hiding something in my truck, but all we saw ere cars with Nebraska tags getting the treatment. Same for Iowa, Ohio and back through Iowa and Nebraska to home.

Guess they just lost interest in us Colorado legal hippies bringing all that top-grade weed into THEIR overworked, over-budget, over-taxed, non-drug state — or maybe they have no more room in their "full of CO druggies" jails.

Oh well, maybe I'll try to sneak in some education material next time. Who knows?
Send your story tips to the author, Michael Roberts.
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Michael Roberts has written for Westword since October 1990, serving stints as music editor and media columnist. He currently covers everything from breaking news and politics to sports and stories that defy categorization.
Contact: Michael Roberts