Remember, back in the day, when you could get a degree from a school on TV? You could become a certified VCR repairman, a home daycare instructor or even learn how to clean guns. It was a wide open world of education. Those in-home lessons on useless shit have all but disappeared, but YouTube has picked up where TV home degrees have fallen out of touch, unfurling a virtual universe of things to learn about.
The website might not give you a legal auto repair technician's degree, but it sure can show you how to put on fake eyelashes correctly, teach you how to make kombucha, or in today's lesson (from our favorite kind of teacher, the suburban teen in her bathroom) walk you through white girl hair extensions. Take it away, SarahXWeave!
Tip #1: Don't ask SarahXWeave any stupid questions. She gets her hair from Paul Mitchell, okay? Figure it out for yourself. Also, as the screen explains a short time later, this is a tutorial on short hair -- but the term "short" is subjective. SarahXWeave had, like, really long hair before this, guys. So if her hair doesn't seem short to you, get over it. It is.
Tip #2: Understand that this is Scene Hair sarcasm Well, the extensions and this tutorial aren't a joke, but SarahXWeave is fully aware that her "coon-tail" isn't original. Or apparently, that it sounds totally racist. But upon further scene hair extension tutorial research (mostly message board perusal), we found that 99 percent of suburban kids wearing racoon-tail patterned hair extensions are completely ignorant to the racial slur in regards to their fake hair. Huh. Tip #3: Making an animated GIF of yourself dancing to Haddaway's "What Is Love?" solidifies your stance as a certified YouTube instructor. Yup, we definitely feel better about what SarahXWeave just taught us about sort of putting in hair extensions. Even though, through her tutorial, we still have no idea how those things stay in place.
Keep Westword Free... Since we started Westword, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of Denver, and we would like to keep it that way. Offering our readers free access to incisive coverage of local news, food and culture. Producing stories on everything from political scandals to the hottest new bands, with gutsy reporting, stylish writing, and staffers who've won everything from the Society of Professional Journalists' Sigma Delta Chi feature-writing award to the Casey Medal for Meritorious Journalism. But with local journalism's existence under siege and advertising revenue setbacks having a larger impact, it is important now more than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" membership program, allowing us to keep covering Denver with no paywalls.