I n a perfect world, everything would come wrapped in bacon. Wrapped in bacon or topped with bacon or with a side of bacon, because everything is better with bacon. What’s better than shrimp? Shrimp wrapped in bacon. What’s the only way to make vegetarian food palatable? Top it with…
For two weeks, my mind has turned inexorably toward the best part of the tastiest animal on God’s green earth — and now you can scratch one spot for getting a midnight bacon fix. When I reviewed Snooze, the “A.M. Eatery” at 2262 Larimer Street (“Pancake Apocalypse,” July 6), what…
With a name like Aphrotini, I was fearful this contender in the T-Zero Signature Drink Contest would contain some weird, curly ingredient. But I quickly learned that the cocktail — concocted by Trilogy bartender Blair Young — referred not to the Afro hairstyle, but to the word “aphrodisiac.” And then…
Sometimes you just need to get out — as I did after being cut off on Colorado Boulevard by one of those punk kids who thinks it’s cool to push his seat back so far that he can’t even see over the steering wheel. And not just get out, but…
It had been too long since I last dropped by Taqueria Patzcuaro. I go into north Denver a lot these days, chasing after some new Chinese-Brazilian fusion restaurant or an intriguing-sounding soup, then end up drinking sake at Swimclub32 or eating at Duo, forgetting why I came up in the…
At my last job, my boss had a butcher’s diagram of a broken-down pig tattooed on her ass. I worked on the line with another guy who had PORK inked across the knuckles of his right hand. And in my family, bacon is how we show our love for one…
I ‘ve eaten tandoori while driving and samosa in bed. I’ve made entire meals of naan and puri and yogurt. During a brief stint as an unwilling vegetarian (I did it for a girl, mostly because the only thing on earth better than pork is pussy, and I had to…
Here’s some stuff I hate: Celery. People who can’t drive and talk on their cell phones at the same time. I’ve got no problem with those who can do both skillfully — but seriously, if talking with your mom, your psychic friend or the phone-sex operator is impairing your ability…
A few weeks ago, as part of my warmup for the Denver Film Festival, I headed to Starz FilmCenter for a training session with a heavy independent film. But first I stopped by the concession stand, where I was delighted to find a bar. Actually, to call it a “bar”…
I’ve never been a huge fan of New Orleans, not even now that it’s the socially progressive thing to be. And while I’ve been intrigued by stories of Mardi Gras, including an account from an old girlfriend who swore that as she left her hotel lobby one Fat Tuesday, she…
There are restaurants that win me over quickly — love at first bite, or damn close to it. There are other restaurants I have to ease into slowly, coming around to their flavors or unique takes on cuisine by the end of the meal. And then there are places that…
I’ve eaten tandoori while driving and samosa in bed. I’ve made entire meals of naan and puri and yogurt. During a brief stint as an unwilling vegetarian (I did it for a girl, mostly because the only thing on earth better than pork is pussy, and I had to give…
The latest location for Tokyo Joe’s is a killer. It’s in the new Southlands Mall development, at the back of the so-called plaza that sits like a box canyon at the end of a natural retail bottleneck; buyers and window-shoppers, tourists and locals alike all funnel into this zone from…
Last week I had lunch at McDonald’s. It doesn’t matter which McDonald’s, because most of them are interchangeable. In fact, they’re the greatest example of assembly-line restaurants in the history of the industry. McDonald’s has gotten so good at self-replication over the past fifty-odd years that today the company is…
A significant part of my childhood consisted of sitting with my family in front of a large, wood-enshrined television watching shows like I Dream of Jeannie and Gunsmoke while eating TV dinners on TV trays and drinking Grape Nehi. As I sat on the orange shag carpet of my suburban…
The Institute of Drinking Studies would like to announce the latest social breakthrough: the adult baby shower. This novel concept progresses far beyond the “Jack and Jill” shower you may have heard of, which is just a ploy to get guys to help in the planning of such estrogen-intensive activity…
When Larry Leith says his idea for Tokyo Joe’s — a fast-casual Japanese rice- and noodle-bowl joint– came out of nowhere (see review, page 50), he may be overlooking a Colorado mini-chain called Kokoro. Founded by Mareo Torito a full decade before Leith opened his first shop, Kokoro has specialized…
I witnessed the kind of chaos that would completely shatter any normal restaurant crew: dining rooms filled to double-capacity, lines stretching out the door, crowds waiting out on the sidewalks and absolutely no room to move on the floor. The Southlands outpost of Tokyo Joe’s is designed like a Ginza…
My meals at Tokyo Joe’s — which I review in the next issue — were among the least interesting things I found when I braved the wilds of the new Southlands development. The grand-opening festivities were like the Do Loung bridge sequence in Apocalypse Now, a crowded, freaked-out mess about…
I’ve been a fan of Ya Hala since it opened more than a year ago. I liked it when it was still just an ugly, stained cement bunker with the (often inaccurate) hours painted on its back; when I would drive by and see bums sprawled in the little half-alley…
While writing my review of Ya Hala (see page 47), I actually stopped halfway through and headed back to Colorado Boulevard to pick up a couple to-go orders of the unbelievably addictive baklava, because I only had a half-order at home and I knew that wasn’t going to be enough…
Chi is supposed to be part of everything that exists, a life force or spiritual energy, translated literally as “air” or “breath.” And Chi Bistro has certainly breathed new life into the old Las Margaritas space on Old South Gaylord. The Asian-influenced room, with its clean lines and minimalist design,…
