Uni-tards

Some call it a natural evolution in adrenaline-fueled extreme sports; others would characterize it more of a athletic mutation — like that duck born with four legs. Either way it had to happen, eventually: extreme unicycling. The sport includes down hill mountain riding — dubbed “MUni” — or distance unicycling…

More Messages: Pot Shots

The murder of marijuana advocate Ken Gorman would have been shocking under any circumstances. He may have been controversial in some quarters, but he was actually a benign personality with an amusingly hippie-dippy sense of humor. In 2002, for instance, he released a CD entitled It’s a Cannabis Christmas, featuring…

More Messages: Back in Black

Supervisors at newspapers aren’t fond of mistakes in general — but they especially despise front-cover gaffes. For that reason, the powers-that-are at the Rocky Mountain News couldn’t have been happy with a screw-up related to the February 17, page-one launch of a black-history-month series that traces the roots of several…

Chi One On

Suddenly, Chi Bistro was being hailed as a restaurant featuring ‘American classics with a flavor of French Indochina’—which ought to have meant Cafe du Monde and cr�me caramel, pho, fish heads and pigs roasted and redolent of gunpowder and Zippo lighter fuel, but didn’t, of course, except for an Asian…

Granola Rap

Gangster rappers in South Boulder? Yup, the stone-faced white boys behind local hip-hop outfit 3OH!3 are truly ready to put the “G” in granola town. Just check out the video for their song “Holler Till You Pass Out” filmed at a Boulder elementary school. Favorite lines include: “Youse a punk…

Bird Brained

Although you can take the cock out of the fight, you can’t take the fight out of the cock. But the state of New Mexico is hoping to take humans out of the cock-fighting equation altogether. Our neighbor to the south is one of two states (the other is Louisiana)…

The Birdcage

Offense Report No: 07-96697 Date: 2-13-07 Type of Offense: Cruelty to Animals Location of Offense: South Denver, Rosedale neighborhood Type of Premises: House Suspect: A 50-year-old female Officer M. Vigil reports: “Investigation revealed that officers went to the listed location in an attempt to arrest [an individual] who was wanted…

The Bald and the Beautiful

It seemed like just last month that Britney Spears’ only shaved head was between her legs. The upside about her rehab-induced mental tailspin? We got a five minute respite from the Anna Nicole baby’s daddy saga. The bad news? Britney Spears finally ruined her last redeeming aspect: her locks. Strangely…

Deep Roots

The sold-out Fillmore was already bumping for the opening DJ before Chi-town sensation Lupe Fiasco (above) took the stage as the warm-up for the Roots on Saturday night. Although brief, Fiasco’s set sent the temperature of the room soaring as he bounced around the stage — militantly for his political…

Fashion Calendar

Cat wishes she had this Tufi Duek dress for the Oscar party. This is a big week for Denver fashion. First, there’s Westword’s annual Artopia party, celebrating the arts in Denver. As part of that, The Cat’s Pajamas has been working on three different local fashion shows: The Fabric Lab…

One More Chance

Last Thursday, the Denver Public School board voted unanimously to approve a one-year renewal of Skyland Community High School, the Big Picture charter school located in the former Cole Middle School building first written about here. It was a down-to-the-wire decision, with one committee recommending that the school be shut…

Another Taste of Denver

My recent musings about the archetypal Denver restaurant, “You Are Where You Eat,” inspired several people to send in their own tastes of Denver. Here’s the slightly ball-obsessed response from Christine Sipple: Well, you might be right — finding a restaurant that truly speaks to you in this city could…

There Goes the Neighborhood

Okay, so the rumors have been flying about some big shakeups happening at Mel’s in Cherry Creek, and I’m here to tell you that the bad news is true. I just got off the phone with owner Mel Master a few minutes ago, and he told me that Mel’s will,…

Little Girl Found

At age five, Alexis Storkson — the child at the center of “Little Girl Lost,” one of the saddest stories ever to appear in Westword — was the sole survivor of an assault that took the lives of her closest family members. Today, however, she’s a high-school graduate who prefers…

Fire Man

Sven Bean’s a smart fighter. When he first saw other fighters mixing different martial arts together, he knew it would change the world’s oldest, most primitive competition forever. Bean was an aging fighter at the time, but he couldn’t resist learning the new fighting style. As he aged out of…

Chopping Down Northwoods

It took less than eight hours for the powers that be to remove the signs above westbound 470 that read “9/11 was an inside job! Google north woods;” for the details of what turned up when I followed this advice, click here. On my drive home yesterday, I checked my…

Have Mercer

The attendees at the February 15 Shins/Viva Voce concert constituted one of the most polite capacity crowds since the adjective “modern” was first affixed to “rock.” Sure, there were plenty of folks who decided to wriggle their way to toward the front of the stage long after they should have,…

Breast Friend

Lately, I’ve been sending articles having to do with babies to my friend and fellow Westword writer, whose wife is due to give birth in the spring. I last forwarded him this Neal Pollack story about circumcision, knowing that it would add yet another layer of anxiety to his early…

Disappearing Tomato

This Just In: Late word from Stephen Anson, who is now the ex-owner of Wholly Tomato up on the hill at 9th and Lincoln. On Wednesday, Anson announced that his two-year-old “healthy fast-food restaurant” was closed as of immediately, and that he’d been bought out by the guys from Deli…

Head On

Offense Report No: 07-92859 Date: 2-11-07 Type of Offense: Felony Menacing Location of Offense: Northwest Denver Weapon/Tool Used: Black rubber mallet with wooden handle Officer G. Scott Riggs reports: “Investigation disclosed that the victim’s [a 33-year-old man and two female passengers] were in a traffic accident with family members of…

Fashion Week: Monday

Cat got got a little distracted this week. But here’s a glimpse at the best and worst of the Monday Fashion Week shows. More of the same trends: volume, bubble skirt, high-waisted pants and sack dresses. Don’t say you haven’t been warned. For a full look at the collections, visit…

Singing Up a Storm

This week’s Message column focuses upon local TV forecasters, who’ve been berated by plenty of viewers simply for delivering updates about our current rash of inclement weather without looking suicidal. Channel 9’s Marty Coniglio (pictured) has gotten similar reactions over the past several months, but he’s not laying low. Indeed,…