Ask a Stoner: Why Am I Red-Eyed and Paranoid at Work Now?

Dear Stoner: I like to smoke weed a lot, but I never smoke before work. Even so, I’m always paranoid at work now when my eyes get red from looking at a computer screen all day.

Dear Crystal: Sounds like the shit you’re smoking is way too strong and you have some guilt to deal with, or you’re just more prone to paranoia than most. Or the lighting in your office is bad. Whatever the case, I recommend that you look into your company’s drug policy. If you’re working in Colorado, there’s a chance that your employer doesn’t drug-test for marijuana — and among companies that do, many don’t test more than once a year unless they have suspicions. Also, because you’re working in front of a computer screen, you don’t have to worry about crashing a company car and getting drug-tested for that.

click to enlarge
Looking at a computer screen too long can make your eyes just as bloodshot as smoking pot can.
Flickr user Dominik Moser
If you’re not toking up before you go to work and are a competent employee, you’re no different from most of the 31 million American adults who regularly smoke pot. Try a high-CBD strain to calm your nerves, and stay away from potent sativas, just to be safe. If you can’t kick the paranoia, maybe it’s time for a break.

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Herbert Fuego is the resident stoner at Westword, ready to answer all your marijuana questions.
Contact: Herbert Fuego