Transcript #1:
Tatiana: Ok, I’m going to check your room real quick, ok, security, security
Officer Gross: Just making sure, you’re not Mr. Poliiiice man.
Why do I look like the police?
Tatiana: Yes you do, actually, to tell you the truth.
Gross: Why?
Tatiana: Cuz you do.
Gross: Why, cuz I’m white?
Tatiana: You’ve got that look in your eye.
Gross: Why, cuz I’m that brown haired white guy?
Tatiana: You’ve got that look, that asshole look.
Gross: I’m just scared.
Tatiana: Don’t be scared of me, I’m the nicest woman you’ll ever meet.
Gross; The guy I talked to on the phone yesterday said this is like fabulous.
Tatiana: Oh yeah, hmmm, yeah, really, mm-hmm.
Gross: That’s what he said.
Tatiana: Ok, what else did he say?
Gross: That’s it, I asked about you first, and then the two girl thing, if it was worth it, and he said yeah, didn’t you see her on craigslist?
Tatiana: You don’t got no cameras, right? I see you got condoms all over, why is that, are you just excited, or do you think you’re going to use all these? No, you’re only using one, so pick what color. You’re not that big, are you?
Gross: Nope.
Tatiana: Yeah, we’ll rule those out, nice try though.
Gross: Sooooo…
Tatiana: So it’s simple, we’ll start off with a massage, lay your butt down.
(Sound of smacking flesh ensues.)
Gross: Do you guys party with each other?
Tatiana: Yes, why do you party?
Gross: That’s what I was hoping for.
Tatiana: Do you party, do you party, what kind of partying do you do?
Gross: I like to party like everyone else.
Tatiana: What kind of partying do you do?
Gross: This kind of partying, although this is my first time partying…
Tatiana: Really now? With two? Well that’s not partying, that’s just having fun. Partying is partying, partying is partying, like totally, so do you party at all?
Gross: No.
Tatiana: No, I didn’t think so, but this is your idea of a party right?
Gross: This is my idea of a party.
Tatiana: I seeeeeee. (More sounds of slapping) Jesus, you dropped a shitload of lotion on him.
Mia: My fault.
Tatiana: You got you a crazy girl.
Gross: Well I’m not scared anymore, I know you just kind of freaked me out, when you called back I was like, oh, I’m going to get a violent chick.
Gross: I can be violent, you want me to be violent, I can smack that ass. (Sound of loud smack.)
A little small talk ensues.
Gross: When do I get to massage you?
Mia: Huh?
Gross: When do I get to massage you?
Mia: Uh, in a while.
Gross tells them that he lies to his wife that he’s going out of town, and gets a hotel room and she thinks he’s just gone today.
Tatiana: Didn’t have this room yesterday. Didn’t you, liar, liar, liar, are you sure you’re not the police.
Tatiana: You’re a bad, bad man, you.
Gross: You’re bossy.
Tatiana: I like being bossy.
Gross: When do I get to massage you?
Tatiana: You wanna massage me, you wanna massage me, massage away, I’m totally cool, massage away.
Gross: And you.
Mia: Oh, me too?
Yeah Gross says.
Tatiana:We’re very cautious when we go into hotels though, just to let you know. If it was a house, yeah the show is out of control, but at a hotel we’re very, very cautious. That is huge. (Referencing the porno playing in the background.)
Both girls: Oh yeah.
Tatiana: She’s trying to deep throat that mother fucker, huh?
Mia: Uh she can’t.
Tatiana: Wow that’s huge.
Mia: Look and she uses both hands.
Tatiana: It’s like a Chipotle burrito. Oh my god.
(More laughter.)
Mia: Do they got special condoms?
Tatiana: Uh, magnums, but some guys can’t even fit condoms, that’s the sucky part I mean, I went, yeah, sometimes they say no condoms and I say too bad you ain’t touchin me with that fucking steroid lookin' mother fucking thing, I mean that thing, the tip of it was like that big, it was like huge, I was like whoa, you ain’t touchin me, get away.
Gross: So when do I get to see you two together?
Tatiana: Soon soon soon. But first we’re gonna play with you how about that one?
Tatiana: What did I do with it.
Gross: What did you do with ‘it?
Tatiana: The condom.
Gross: I think I’ll stand. (Sound of condom wrapper being torn open.)
Tatiana: Is that ok?
Gross: Yeah.
Tatiana: Good.
Gross lets out a growl before the tape cuts off.
Transcript #2: Working Girl: So do you have any special requests or anything outside of the norm that we should probably talk about in advance? Or is it pretty normal. Officer: Any rules? Working Girl: Um, I just like to safe in everything I do and that’s about it. Officer: Can I get behind you? Working Girl: Sure, but um, you know um Greek. Usually I mean, I have that request every now and then and that’s nothing I can say yes to like right off the bat. I actually have to see you first. Officer: Yah, I understand Working Girl: So, um. But no that’s it, just like I said, I just like to be safe Officer: Okay, Do you have… Working Girl: Of course Officer: Do you have Condoms? Working Girl: Do you need special condoms? Officer: I don’t need any special kind. I don’t think I’ll be, uh, too large for any Greek play. But I’ll let you make up your mind. Working Girl: Is that something that you like? Officer: Um yah, it depends, it depends on the girl. Mostly it’s, uh, the breast size, and uh… Working Girl: The breast size makes you want greek? Officer: No, it’s the whole from behind reach around and feel thing. Working Girl: Okay. Officer: Kind of weird… Working Girl: By looking at me what do you think? Officer: I think you’d be perfect. So if that works for you, then that works for me. Working Girl: Well like I said, I gotta see first but I definitely would ask for a tip too, so… Officer: That’s fine, if not greek then just straight but from behind with a reach around. Working Girl: Alright, well I mean I didn’t ask for like specifics like that like something specific. Maybe you want to have something, like the Greek thing would be out of the norm for me so, that’s all… Officer: No I’m not too freaky, I’m going to go the bathroom too. So if you will get ready… Working Girl: I will, did you want me to, does it matter if we’re under the blankets or not.. Officer: No, doesn’t matter to me.