Dear Stoner: I want to send some marijuana for a friend in need who lives in a non-MMJ state. What do you recommend?
Dear TJ: For shipping, repackage the MMJ products (foil for candy bars, baggies for brownies, vials for tinctures, vitamin bottles for pills, etc.). Put stuff like clothes, chips or any random trinket on top of the pot to make it look like a care package. If you’re really paranoid, you can shave off or melt the green “THC” stamps most edibles have now, but you’re probably wasting your time: I ship with USPS without a return address and pay with cash, and usually use a fake name for the receiver. The Post Office doesn’t require an ID check from the sender or receiver, and you’ll still get a tracking number.
Remember, though, this is illegal, and some major mailers who've been caught have paid a heavy price.
Dear Stoner: My almost-21-year-old daughter has horrible undiagnosed stomach pains that are aggravated by the stress they cause. We’re currently uninsured and don’t know a doctor. Do you have suggestions for what marijuana might be good for this? Tincture? Edibles?
Stuck in Sh*t
Dear Stuck: Sorry to hear about your daughter. If you’re in Colorado, you can still find a doctor who can examine her for a medical marijuana card — insurance companies generally don’t cover MMJ costs anyway, thanks to the plant’s federally illegal status. But if you don’t live in the state or time is of the essence, then I suggest calling a few MMJ clinics and bugging the staff for a few minutes of advice. Hanging up would be pretty heartless after hearing about your situation, and you might be surprised by how willing they are to help. It’s even better to talk to budtenders in person.
I frequently experience stomach issues because of gag-reflex problems, allergies and anxiety. Smoking flower usually does the trick, but if I can’t smoke, I’ll start with a small dose of tincture for immediate help and then turn to edibles for all-day relief. With your daughter, I would try CBD-heavy products first, then go with low amounts of THC — which is great for relaxing the stomach, but the effects can be overwhelming for new users. Start with extremely small doses (one to two milligrams at a time) and monitor her for a few hours, then decide if you want to try more. Anything she can ingest could work — pills, liquids, etc. — if she doesn’t like brownies and candies, but you should go with whichever product is easiest to monitor and regulate.
Good luck. And remember: I’m no doctor.
Have a question for our Stoner? Send it to firstname.lastname@example.org.
Keep Westword Free... Since we started Westword, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of Denver, and we would like to keep it that way. Offering our readers free access to incisive coverage of local news, food and culture. Producing stories on everything from political scandals to the hottest new bands, with gutsy reporting, stylish writing, and staffers who've won everything from the Society of Professional Journalists' Sigma Delta Chi feature-writing award to the Casey Medal for Meritorious Journalism. But with local journalism's existence under siege and advertising revenue setbacks having a larger impact, it is important now more than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" membership program, allowing us to keep covering Denver with no paywalls.