Dear Stoner: Why don’t growers name strains based on their effects? That would make my decisions at the dispensary much easier.
Dear Roy: That does sound like a swell idea. Impossible, but swell. For starters, almost every strain of cannabis would be called “Hungry, Happy, Sleepy,” since that’s how most novice users experience weed, no matter the strain name. After getting past that group, you’d have to start dealing with the intricacies and differences in how each of our endocannabinoid systems respond to different strains.
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Believe it or not, there are some people who get tired and easily distracted after smoking Sour Diesel, and others who want to write a screenplay after trying Skywalker OG, which usually puts me in the dirt. If we’re being honest, dispensaries probably wouldn’t want to label strains based on effect, either. Just imagine if bars did that with alcohol: No one would ever drink whiskey or tequila again.
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