Marijuana

Ask a Stoner: How Long Until My Baby Weed Plant Stinks?

Westword
Dear Stoner: I received a small weed plant from an Uber rider last night, but I live in an apartment. How long until this starts stinking up the place?
Ross

Dear Ross: After seeing all of the drugs, weird hats and free food my Uber-driving friends get, I’ve considered driving myself. Not that I’d necessarily want to be stuck with this specific decision. Nobody wants to reject the stray orphan, but what if that orphan only brings trouble? It’s a classic tough guy/lost kid dilemma that so many adventure stories are based on. And here your abandoned child is a tiny little pot plant. Are you ready to take on the evil establishment to ensure its survival?

click to enlarge
Scott Lentz
Hate to tell you, but the little sprout will probably skunk it up at any point from three to six weeks of vegetation, and it only gets worse from there (you might not smell it at first, but visitors and people in your hallway certainly will). By the time the buds are flowering, no layer of closets, bedroom doors or open windows can save you. Find a good home for it yesterday, or you’ll have to take ol’ yeller outside.

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Herbert Fuego is the resident stoner at Westword, ready to answer all your marijuana questions.
Contact: Herbert Fuego