During an interview yesterday on KOA (click here to listen to it), Peyton Manning listed his five favorite movies -- all comedies from 1979 to 1985. He added that teammates need to watch the flicks, because otherwise when he quotes from them, the players won't have any idea what the hell he's talking about.
To assist future Broncos, we've assembled clips from the top five, in the order Manning listed them, with quotes from each (courtesy of IMDB) and situations when they might be used. Enjoy -- and you're welcome!
Number 5: The Jerk (1979)
First quote: To be used when meeting a new player
Navin R. Johnson: For one dollar I'll guess your weight, your height, or your sex.
Second quote: To be used when reassuring a veteran player who's just made a rookie mistake
Mother: Navin, I'd love you if you were the color of a baboon's ass.
Third quote: To be used when receiving the latest playbook
Navin R. Johnson: The new phone book's here! The new phone book's here!
First quote: To be used when a rookie fumbles
Judge Smails: I've sentenced boys younger than you to the gas chamber. Didn't want to do it. I felt I owed it to them.
Second quote: To be used when a running back hits the gap at full speed
Carl Spackler: IT'S IN THE HOLE.
Third quote: To be used when the final whistle blows in a big victory
Al Czervik: Hey everybody, we're all gonna get laid!
First quote: To be used after the tenth win in eleven games
John Winger: [to the soldiers in his platoon] We're soldiers; but we're American soldiers. We've been kickin' ass for 200 years. We're 10 and 1.
Second quote: To be used after Peyton scrambles at his usual modest speed
Sergeant Hulka: Soldier, I've noticed that you're always last. John Winger: I'm pacing myself, Sergeant.
Third quote: To be used during spring training calisthenics
Russell Ziskey: [while Winger is doing push ups for the bet with Ziskey] I think you're ready for the Special Olympics....
First quote: To be used when visiting another player's home
Fletch: Oh, you've remodeled the garage. Must have cost you hundreds.
Second quote: To be used when coming to the sidelines after being sacked
Fletch: Can I borrow your towel for a sec? My car just hit a water buffalo.
Third quote: To loosen up a new center
Fletch: [During a proctological exam] You using the whole fist, Doc?
First quote: To be used during an away game
Clark: We're from out of town. Man Giving Directions: No shit.
Second quote: To be used when explaining why he moved from Indianapolis to Denver
Clark: Oh Ellen, the Old West was dirty. Everything isn't like home. If everything were like home, there would be no reason for leaving home.
Third quote: To be used when handing the ball off instead of passing
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Clark: Why aren't we flying? Because getting there is half the fun. You know that.
More from our Sports archive: "Photos: Broncos player seen peeing behind Peyton Manning in team-produced video."