Fracking is booming, but a friendlier name couldn't hurt. Drill, baby, drill!

The word of the year? Our money (and yours) is on "fracking," the shortened term for "hydraulic fracturing," a practice that shook neighborhoods (in some cases literally) around the country this year, and has fueled the oil and gas boom in northeastern Colorado. But if energy execs really want to...

By Patricia Calhoun

December 29, 2011

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The word of the year? Our money (and yours) is on "fracking," the shortened term for "hydraulic fracturing," a practice that shook neighborhoods (in some cases literally) around the country this year, and has fueled the oil and gas boom in northeastern Colorado. But if energy execs really want to drill deep into our collective consciousness in 2012, they should consider changing the term "fracking" to something a little less invasive...and a lot more friendly.

According to energyfromshale.org, "In a hydraulic fracturing job, 'fracturing fluids' or 'pumping fluids' consisting primarily of water and sand are injected under high pressure into the producing formation, creating fissures that allow resources to move freely from rock pores where it is trapped." There, that doesn't sound so bad, does it? All fracking needs is a kindler, gentler name -- and here are our top ten nominees.

10) Smooching.

9) Cuddling

8) Wooing

7) Cajoling

6) Fluffing

5) Persuading

4) Spooning

3) Stroking

2) Hugging

and the number one choice?

1) Tickling

Frack you! Governor John Hickenlooper lavished some love on fracking in 2011. Read Alan Prendergast's"Fracking lovefest blooms from John Hickenlooper's gas play" here.

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Patricia Calhoun is editor-in-chief of Westword, the alt-weekly she co-founded in September 1977. She’s been inducted into the Colorado Press Association Hall of Fame, the Association of Alternative Newsmedia Hall of Fame and the Colorado Restaurant Association Hall of Fame. She’s also received dozens of local, state and national awards for writing, including first place for feature writing and first place for column writing with the Society of Professional Journalists. Patricia is a weekly commentator on Colorado Inside Out, PBS 12's public affairs roundtable, which has won two Emmys.

Contact: Patricia Calhoun

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