Celebrities get lucky with interviews most of the time. Networks cut down strange content, or if the interview is too weird, they never make it into print. Regardless of studio and agent watchdogs, countless interviews have made us uncomfortable enough to cringe, even if we couldn't pull our eyes and ears away.
This one didn't make the list, but holy crap if it doesn't make us cringe and chuckle gleefully with delight every single time we see it. Our favorite exchange: "I know you're coming out here and you're trying to be crazy and you fuck up shit with your little saw," Tom Green says. "I come out every night and fuck up shit with my little saw," Jesse James Dupree fires back at Green, to which he says, "That's probably really funny, yeah? Does it get a laugh normally?" Follow the jump to see the ten that did make the list.
10. Sigur Rós on NPR's Bryant Park: Sometimes you feel sorry for the artist in an interview, sometimes you feel sorry for the interviewer. We feel sorry for everyone here. The interviewer's questions are about the same quality as those of a high-school newspaper, but the band's not helping, either. Do they feel stupid? Awkward? Are they mocking the interviewer? We've haven't a clue, but it sure makes us feel a bit like puking.
09. Crispin Glover on Letterman: My goodness. What more can we say? What is Crispin Glover doing? More important, why can't David Letterman handle him? Crispin Glover might be playing something awful here, but at the same time, David Letterman should have been able to deal with it a little better. The follow-up video, which attempts to explain everything two and a half years later, isn't much better.
08. Jim Everett on Jim Rome: If we were giant dudes and you kept calling us by a different name, we'd be pretty pissed, too. Jim Rome's voice has always been a little grating for us, so seeing him get socked was not only cringe-worthy, but a wee bit satisfying as well.
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07. Joaquin Phoenix on Letterman: Joke, hoax, whatever -- there is no saving the complete and utter weirdness of this interview. We haven't figured this one out, and frankly, we'd prefer to let it just rest in the annals of history as "the time Joaquin Phoenix was on Letterman and it was weird."
06. Artie Lange on Joe Buck Live: This was difficult to actually track down. It seems like the Internet didn't want to keep it hosted anywhere. Either way, this appearance got Lange booted off of HBO for a bit. We're not going to argue with anti-Cowboys sentiments, but, well, you can decide for yourself on this one.
05. Andrew Dice Clay on CNN: The interviewer accuses Andrew Dice Clay of owning a gym, and naturally he drops a few hundred F-bombs for good measure. We're guessing he got a big fucking fine for it, but the interviewer's face at the end of the clip would have made it worthwhile for us, too.
04. Jon Stewart on Crossfire: This is obviously geared to cause a ruckus, but even so, we can't help but sit on the edge of our seats for the entire interview. The audience reaction is equally awkward and strange. Jon Stewart takes it on from the get-go, and it's a strange downward spiral from there. One of our favorite quotes comes right before a cut: "You know what's interesting? You're as big of a dick on your show as you are on any show."
03. Paula Abdul on Seattle Fox News: We're pretty sure Paula Abdul is on a mix of drugs here. It's more embarrassing than anything else, but we have to hand it to the local anchors for keeping it as on the level as humanly possible. We'd probably have just giggled uncontrollably and called her out.
02. Gene Simmons on Fresh Air: Between Simmons bragging about how much money he has ("more than NPR") and propositioning interviewer Terry Gross for sex, this is hands down one of the most awkward and strange interviews of all time. Case in point: the interview is no longer available on the NPR website. If you listen to Fresh Air regularly you'll get a bit more enjoyment out of this, but everyone can enjoy the battle of Wit v. Wiener.
01. Phoenix interviewed by Snooki: From the get-go this one makes all of us feel weird for every one involved in the shot including the cameraman. For what it's worth, we think that guy looks more like our own Mr. Pacman than the guy from Twilight, but what do we know?