Top ten places to play like a pirate in Denver
Real Pirates: The Untold Story of the Whydah is now open at the Denver Museum of Nature and Science, and if you are like us, it has awakened a deep desire to live our lives as pirates, right here in Denver. This can be a challenge, given that we are law-abiding citizens in a landlocked state, but that doesn't mean we can't pretend. Our top ten places in Denver to play like a pirate:
10. Pirate: Contemporary Art
They're not exactly going for the literal interpretation, but you can still scowl and gesticulate wildly to express your feelings on current exhibitions of contemporary artists.
9. Downtown Aquarium
Get a taste for the watery mysteries of the ocean frontier at the aquarium, where you can imagine you're doing battle with a squid or holding a mermaid for ransom.
8. The U.S. Mint
Just take a look at all that booty! On the other hand, we're 100% confident that it would take more than an eye patch and some moxy to plunder the treasures of the U.S. Mint. Still, you are more than welcome to go and watch all those coins glimmer.
7. A Denver Pirates Game
The Colorado Football Conference has been around for over twenty years. The Denver Pirates may have never won a title, but true pirates don't ride bandwagons. And if you really think you could do better, go ahead and join the team.
6. Water World
It is a crucial pirate skill to know the safest way to descend a water slide. After all, you can't be diving into a treasure cove head first. That's just asking for coral to the noggin', and how are you supposed to fend off the coast guard with a concussion?
5. City Park Paddle Boats
Get your sea legs under you with a paddle tour of Ferril Lake, right in the shadow of the Real Pirates exhibit. Be sure to steal some ice cream from a little kid to get the full effect.
4. Flossy McGrew's
Those thrown-together halloween warehouses ain't got shit on Flossy, where the mere act of shopping is its own form of treasure-seeking. It's fourth on this list, but really you should make this your first stop on the pirate tour of Denver, so as to be dressed for the occasion through the rest.
3. Colorado Parrot Rescue
Dogs are for squares. Want a pet that tells people to keep a wide berth as they walk by you on the street? Get a parrot and train it to sit on your shoulder barking obscenities at passersby. Or just adopt one and treat it like a normal pet. We hear they are whip smart and live forever.
2. Pirate's Cove
It may be the smaller of Denver's two water parks, but its thematic pirate elements make it much easier to slip into your swashbuckling imagination here. If we just keep digging, we know there's treasure buried somewhere in that sand pit...
1. Aurora Reservoir
Some say it's the best boating in the metro area. There's also archery and scuba diving available, and while you aren't allowed to combine the two, we feel they are both invaluable pirate skills. The Reservoir has not one but two officially designated coves, which as far as we're concerned is Disneyland to a pirate.
Continue living the pirate dream with our top ten places to drink like a pirate
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