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Why Colorado Tokers Love Hulkamania

Hulkamania’s high is actually quite gentle on the body and mind, brotherEXPAND
Hulkamania’s high is actually quite gentle on the body and mind, brother
Herbert Fuego

Hulk Hogan and reporters have a complicated relationship. After becoming wrestling's biggest name, making a few Hollywood movies and pimping out his family for a reality show, Hogan was caught on video having sex with his friend's wife (that friend goes by the name Bubba the Love Sponge, by the way). Hogan sued Gawker, the website that published the video, for libel, and over the course of the lawsuit was revealed to have said the N-word several times in reference to a Black man with whom his daughter was romantic. Racism didn't stop Hogan (whose lawyers were bankrolled by Peter Thiel, a billionaire venture capitalist outed as gay by Gawker years earlier) from winning the case, which led to the bankruptcy of Gawker Media (the parent company of websites like Gawker, Deadspin, Lifehacker, Gizmodo, Jezebel and more), and reshaped the freedoms of American journalism.

I'm still waiting for Adam McKay and Will Ferrell to make a movie about this fascinating, disgusting story. That's probably why I was instantly drawn to a strain by the name of Hulkamania, because I sure don't view Hogan as a brother, brother.

Somehow, our two famous Hulks were mixed up in the naming process of Hulkamania, a mix of Monster Cookies and Bruce Banner, the alter-ego of the Incredible Hulk; there's a version with Do-Si-Dos and Zkittles genetics instead of Monster Cookies, too. Either way, that's some serious strength in the family history, and an interesting crossing of head and body highs. Bruce Banner's daytime buzz gives me a rare combination of stress relief and creative energy, while Monster Cookies' Grand Daddy Purple and Girl Scout Cookies background is the pot equivalent of a body slam. Hulkamania presented an unpredictable first spin, and having nothing to do on a Tuesday night gave me the perfect opportunity to take a ride.

Despite its rippling name, Hulkamania was easy on the mind and body, allowing me to finish a book and voting research before cleaning the kitchen. Realizing I'd forgotten to take the trash to the alleyway at 11 p.m., I actually did it — something weed usually makes impossible when it's late and cold outside. The high was so easy-going and productive that I even did my roommate's dishes. Motivation to clean up after myself is one thing. Motivation to clean after others? Now things are getting weird. Leave it to a strain named after the Hulkster to be full of surprises.

We've only experienced Hulkamania from L'Eagle and Lightshade, but given that Dark Horse Genetics, a breeder with ties to Denver, produces the strain, expect to see more of it around soon.

Looks: Although not the most muscular buds I've ever seen, Hulkamania is still dense, with calyxes compacting together to form segmented buds that like to break apart into large, circular chunks. Although purple spots are rare, rusty pistils and a white coating of trichomes give the strain a glowing effect.

Smell: Sweet, minty and spicy up front, Hulkamania carries a meringue-like sweetness that clashes with herbal, peppery notes and a gassy back end. This could be the weed talking, but the aroma smells more like tea than cannabis sometimes.

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Flavor: Hulkamania's initial minty, herbal and spicy flavors are stronger than the sweet berry notes that follow, with hints of vanilla and lemon lingering just long enough to gain notice.

Effects: Hardly debilitating and easy on the head, Hulkamania's high never put me down as expected. Even with a strong case of the munchies and looser limbs, I was more productive than usual, and less stressed.

Home grower's take: "Could've grown it on autopilot for the ten weeks I had it, and it produced well, but I didn't like it enough to keep it around after the first run. I didn't think the high was strong, and if it's not strong enough for me, it's not strong enough for [medical] patients."

Is there a strain you'd like to see profiled? Email marijuana@westword.com.

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